Scary

Someone at work commented that their family's investment portfolio had lost 'x thousand dollars' in the last six months. And my first thought was 'we've lost 10 times that in the last six months'....but I didn't say it 'cuz it's a really big number and I don't want to be seen as boastful. And it's none of their business.

I'm blessed that we've lost 10 times what they've lost 'cuz it means we have way more to lose. But at the same time, it's getting pretty frickin' scary.

Today, we received a letter from our equity line carrier advising that they have frozen our credit line and we will no longer be able to make draws against it. The letter was well worded, making it clear that we have handled our account in an exemplary manner, they appreciate our business, nothing about our existing terms or payment terms are changing. It's simply that their house valuation system has confirmed that our property is no longer worth enough to support the full line and so they have frozen it. Thankfully, they aren't asking us to fully repay what's outstanding - part of which we had to borrow when we refinanced to a much lower rate many years back to stay at the 80% LTV (to avoid PMI) and then partly to pay for the beautiful remodeling of the 'study' we did several years back as well. Both things were completely 'worth it' and we dutifully pay as much as we can (above the 'minimum') every month. And we will continue to do that. However, that's one less 'cushion' we have available (and again, I acknowledge thankfully that we are blessed with significant cushions so no worries) - we might have used it for college expenses at some point, but now we won't. Good thing B. is getting a job.

We have other financial milestones coming up - some assets that we have held for some time and now we are fast approaching the date where we MUST cash them in - and it couldn't be at a worse time. They are significantly devalued...which is sad. But oh well. Whatever they end up being valued at, it is more than we had before we cashed them in. It just bums me out how it seems like we are always on the wrong side in these things. I had these same 'assets' in my prior corporate life and they were also worth a bit at one point. But I was so confident in my former company that I held them - until they weren't worth the paper they were printed on. And I ended up with zip. Oh well. That's the gamble. It's not always 'easy' to decide when to hold or when to fold.

The good thing is: we've been here before. We lived in a home that was worth significantly less than we paid for it within a few months of buying it. And we stayed there for 10 years because we had to. We couldn't sell for what we owed. Here, we could sell for what we owed - walk away with not much cash - but we don't want to nor need to. This is our home and we love it here and we're never leaving (until they carry us out) and so it matters not that the property is devaluing along with everyone else's property. We don't care. We love it here...and are very happy here. These have been the happiest years of my life - these almost 8 years in this house. So it could be worse. I don't want to leave here - so not being able to doesn't bother me. And that IS a huge difference/improvement from where we've been the last time the housing market tanked.

So whatever happens to the economy, we're fine. And we're staying. And if I have to work until I'm 80 to support my soon to be retired husband, so be it. As long as I come home to him and this house after every long day, it's all good.