Tuesday, August 16, 2005

HighSchool

My 'baby' is starting high school today. I am overwhelmed with these feelings of 'stop'. Just stop. Don't grow up. Stay a kid. Stay with me forever. Of course, I don't mean that. There are plenty of times when I can't WAIT for the kids to be grown and gone. But my heart says 'stop'. I am already starting to miss them. In four years, I'll be sending B. off to college - and then two years after that, H. will leave. And their entire growing up time will be over in what will seem (and does seem) like a split second.

They don't need us as much anymore. No more boo-boos to make better. They do need us for allowance and transportation - but that's about it. Other than that, we are the 'parental units' and are pretty much a PITA for them. They love us - no doubt about that. I know they do. And we adore them. But they are growing up - something that can't be stopped. Nor should it be. I just wish I had known when they were small how fast it would go by. I would have taken more pictures. I would have played with them more.

B. survived his first day. He said he ate lunch on a bench near his locker. He was worried he would 'miss' his class so he stayed near to where he needed to be in case he was supposed to be there. Makes sense. Of course, as his mother, I think 'you can't eat lunch by yourself everyday. GO to the cafeteria. Make friends. Don't be a loner'. I'm actually fine with him being a loner. I just don't want him to be lonely. I see myself being interviewed years from now saying 'well, we thought he was normal until he started eating lunch by himself every day. That was the first sign'.

And need I remind you, good reader, it's only his FIRST DAY of high school. This is going to be a long year. I'll be exhausted from all my 'fretting' by the time he hits his senior year. College ought to be a real trip/treat.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Beginnings

B. (my oldest - 14 1/2) is starting high school next week. NEXT WEEK. When did this happen, people? Really - when?

I am realizing more and more everyday that now, my job as a mom is to LET GO. That's pretty hard to do - and REALLY hard to do 'cuz I tend to want to control things. I'm a big believer in thinking things through, several times; anticipating consequences and/or issues and thinking through how I'll handle them. B. is (I assume) a typical teen boy - he lives in the moment; frets about little (except his current obsession w/ anyplace we're eating out must have rootbeer as a beverage selection or he's not interested in eating there). I, on the other hand, am a worrier...and a long time, very skilled worrier at that. I don't sleep very well. Does that surprise you?

Anyway, B. went to his high school orientation this week. Alone. Like the campus I work at (community college), the students at his high school do the orientation for new students. B. didn't ask a lot of questions. Or pay attention to some obvious issues that needed to be asked. For example, Period 4 on the schedule is actually FOUR periods - 4A, early lunch, 4B, late lunch. Our dialog about this issue went something like this:

Me: So when is your lunch period and when is your class period?
B: Huh?
Me: There are two lunch times and two class times for period 4. So when is your class time and when is your lunch time?
B: They didn't talk about that.
Me: (perplexed 'cuz I'm reasonably sure they must have mentioned it) Hmmm. Guess we'll add that to the list of things we ask.

(J. called the school the next day and it turns out, they don't tell the kids which lunch or class period until the very first day when the figure out how many bodies are on which side of the campus at any given time. Amazing, isn't it?)

B.'s other keen observation about orientation was his amazement at waiting in line 2 1/2 hours to register for classes and get his class schedule. My response was 'get used to it'. (I work at a college and lines are a fact of life).

So, B.will be on his own in a school clear across town (unlike his grade school which is 2 blocks from our house). He will ride a school bus to and from most days -but during marching band (football season), we are still trying to figure out how to get him home. At the moment, he may walk the three blocks to the public library and study there until we can pick him up. Or, he'll catch a ride home w/ a fellow band mate or friend who's there for soccer. There's a lot of logistics still to work out. All will be solved when B. can drive - and I can't believe I'm about to say this - but I'll be glad when we can get him someway to get himself to and from. THEN, I'll REEEAALLLLYYYY have to work on letting go. Him behind the wheel of a moving vehicle is a very scary thought. He can't even put Nestle Quick powder in a glass without the powder (and often times the milk) getting everywhere. How's he going to DRIVE?

LET GO. LET GO. I just keep repeating that mantra and anticipate continuing that exercise for many, MANY years to come.

March

I'm starting to think maybe I will just do a monthly post and call it what it is - whatever month we're in.  Here we are winding dow...