Where Did November Go?

Absolutely cannot believe today is the last day of November, 2021.  The month flew by so quickly. 

J. asked 'what are plans for the day' and I said 'piddling around the house'.  He said 'Christmas decorating?'.  My reply was yes.  But then realized it would be better to start with getting all the Goodwill donation stuff out of the garage and to the donation center(s).  So we tackled that.  Felt good about having way more stuff to donate than I thought we would - partly because I finally was ready to let some things go.  Lots of Crate and Barrel area rugs - some new with tags and even a couple of the underlayments to keep the rug from sliding all over the place.  Also finally let my Nespresso machine and accessories go.  I bought that machine just before Nespresso introduced a Keurig-like machine and it really pissed me off to have spent so much money on something that was now sort of 'out-dated'.  Nespresso espresso is delicious! and I loved making lattes every morning but the Keurig we have now is just so much easier.  It took me two moves and a couple years to be ready but someone is going to find a real thrift store find.  

Also finally letting go of the bins of clothes I have for my (then) larger self.  I've stayed pretty much the same size since losing a little weight and actually many of the pants I wear around the house these days are too big.  It's time to let the clothes bless someone else and get them out of the overhead storage.  (They are stored in flip bins).  

It's the day before our cleaning ladies come so I walk around identifying things that need doing but then think 'but I'm paying someone to do those things tomorrow so...I shouldn't worry about it today'.  There's a two week break in between their visits so there's always stuff to do - but I'm trying very hard to not pre-clean the house they are being paid to clean.  

(I just went to the kitchen for some water and I had to wipe the counters.  I just couldn't leave crumbs from our sandwich making on the counters until tomorrow.  And now the sun is hitting the under-TV cabinets in the study just right to show all the dust inside them - they remain empty so far 'cuz we haven't organized DVDs yet.  So I'll be wiping those cabinets out shortly.)

And I think I might go to a casino when they are here but will think about it.  It's so easy when 'more flush than usual' to play way more and I do want our extraordinary wins to last a while.

I've done my part for cyber shopping - I can't resist a sale!  I ordered so many things I had to create a list so I can keep track of what's arrived and what's still in transit.  I also scored J. the Turtle Beach Velocity controller for his Microsoft Flight Simulator!  It took constant reloading of the website page but I finally successfully got one!  Last week, the same process resulted in me having one in my cart but as I looked at a text for my Shopify code to enter, the item left my cart and went to someone else.  I gave some feedback - especially when they sent emails about 'you've left something in your cart'.  Um, NO I DID NOT.  In fact, you TOOK SOMETHING out of my cart.  Grrr.  But we got one this week so....  Next week, we try for a second one (J. will buy that one to comply with the one per customer) for B. .  His work schedule isn't allowing him to set up and reload over and over at a specific time so we'll try for him.  

It reminded me of Christmas' of the past when I'd move mountains to get the kids what they most wanted.   

We talked to B. last night who was off yesterday and spent the day flying.  His instructor is still with him but all the flying is being done by B. and he's pretty excited about that!  It is exciting!  Today starts his new assignment with his new company and he was looking forward to experiencing something different.  I think he was ready to move away from Infantry work.  He enjoyed it but he's been doing it a long time.  Change is good.

My Day Came the Very Next Day!

Thanksgiving was its usual whirlwind of a day.  Ran the dishwasher three times (at least) and cooked all day.  Food was delicious and we have lots of leftovers.  Will cut back on stuffing and green bean casserole next year to make it more manageable for two people.  

Leftovers are great but not for weeks.

We did not hear from H. and while we were OK with that in concept, the reality is we're left being worried that he isn't ok.  (Alive.  I don't like saying that but that's what we're worried about).  It does seem odd to not hear from him even a little.  We'll see what happens at Christmas. 

We went to Atlantis yesterday because they were having a huge sale at the gift shop.  They always have really pretty holiday decor items that are somewhat unique.  The prices are ridiculously high - but there was a 30% off sale AND we'd use comps to pay so it's zero out of pocket.  

I got on a Dragonlink machine that kept me playing for HOURS.  Up and down and all around enjoying the company playing next to me - really nice lady in Reno for Thanksgiving to spend time with her kids.  She was doing very well - consistently betting $1.50 on penny denom.  She left to head home (lives near Sacramento).  

Things started happening.  

First, a Major.  $605.75 for the green orb and $185 for the rest.  Nice!  This pic was at 2:22PM.  

I put a lot of the win back.  Ended up putting in a $100 bill and decided to finish 'big' - nickel denom, $6.25 bet.  That is a VERY large bet for me but I felt like it was worth taking a shot - I'd end the day 'down' but still had a blast.  

I got a bonus round...and I thought to myself 'these orbs are awfully small considering the bet level'.  Next thing I knew, this happened: 

I hit the GRAND JACKPOT!  $11K+!!  It was epic!!  These pics were at 3:42PM. 

Decided to play a wee bit more - had to wait for the handpay and then was just sort of in shock about it all. At 3:59PM, this happened:  

What a day!!  Our casino host had just come by and I shared with her what happened at Gold Dust West last weekend - how close I came to hitting a huge Grand but missed it by ten minutes or so (and not going back to that machine).  I said 'I hope that means my first Dragonlink Grand will be here at Atlantis'.  She said she hoped so too.  

And minutes later, it hit!!  I wondered if it was just coincidence.  If I were playing at an Indian casino in California, I know for sure they can manipulate player experience.  But in Nevada?  No.  It was coincidence. 

After leaving Dragonlinks, I went and played Mighty Cash Ultra.  As I was making my way there, a guy said 'hey, you're the lady who just won $11,000 on Dragonlink - congratulations!'  I thanked him and he said 'sorry to just call you out like that'.  I said 'no worries.  It's been a fun day for sure'.  He introduced me to his wife and said 'so are you going to buy a car or pay a bill or what will you use the money for?'  I said 'I am blessed to say that all wins go into our fun money account - for future play.  Our needs and wants are more than met'.  He said 'wow, that's really amazing'.   J. joined me at Mighty Cash and we played awhile.  I had some great hits on that game as well but continue to chase the ridiculously high Grand.  Someday!! 

After a big win, I like to randomly give a couple people $100 - I would have loved to have given it to the lady I was first playing with at Dragonlink.  If I hadn't known she was driving home, I would have looked for her.  She was fun. I'll keep an eye out for her again someday.  So two ladies who played next to me on the Mighty Cash game each received $100.  The second lady kept refusing to accept it - so I had to say 'we've had a truly extraordinary week on the win side of things and it really makes me so happy to share the luck with other players.  Please take it - play on something new and/or bet big(ger) and see what happens!'.  She thanked me profusely and it makes me feel so good to bless someone with a bit of play. 

So that was the day after Thanksgiving, 2021 - a day that will be long remembered.  I sent B. the screen shot of the 15 orbs and he said 'nice'.  I said 'right?  My first GRAND.  $11K'.  He wrote back and said 'oh!  I was excited for the $231.25' - which was the win for the fifteen orbs.  

Super stoked to be very flush and now really REALLY looking forward to spending NYE there.  The losses lately have been so bad that I told J. I wasn't even really sure I wanted to go - but now I'll have play money so yay!!  More fun!!

Thanksgiving 2021

On our drive to Reno yesterday (free play day and the giveaway was pumpkin pies so we did our weekly trek on a Wednesday), I told. J. 'I am not sure if I'm hoping to hear from H. or not.  I mean...I am.  I hope we might hear from him?  But at the same time, I don't know what I'll say.  What to say'.  He said he was feeling the same so that helped. I reminded myself of things I want to say.  I will be sure to say how good it is to hear his voice; that we love him; care about him and worry about him.  And that every night before I close my eyes for sleep, I ask God to keep an eye on him.  

It's 2:34PM and so far, no call.  Phones are switched on and never far away - and it's OK either way, really.  Truly.  I'm sure it's way harder for him to think of the call because...well, when your parents realize the length, depth and breadth of the non-truths you've told for months - and you know they know - that would be daunting to say the least. 

The fresh turkey is about halfway through it's cook cycle and all the sides are ready to warm.  J. is getting the potatoes cooked for The Pioneer Woman mashed potato recipe which works for getting them done and then rewarmed right before serving.  

We had a super fun day at Atlantis yesterday - slots were paying and I spent 5 hours at a Dragonlink machine and finished the day with a hand pay!!  Woot woot!

Have to share the bad with the good.  Long story.  I played Dragonlinks at our local casino on Sunday.  I had a good day - but ended up down a bit.  Now I am/was pretty flush thanks to J.'s Blackjack tournament 1st place - but I'm working really hard on knowing when to stop.  I went to the kiosk to swipe my card - had $20 in earned free play so I went back to Dragonlinks again - the machine I was on was available - but I moved to the machine on the left.  Played it a bit - nothing happened - and left.  Later that day, I realized there was another player perk that I should have swiped my card for so I told J. 'I'm going to go back to do that and I'll be right home'.  The $15,500 Grand jackpot had hit in the few hours between my visit - and a lady I knew was there with me that morning told me that it hit on my machine.  $5 bet on 2 cent denomination.  DANG IT!  I wished more than anything I hadn't come back 'cuz I would have realized on my next visit that the jackpot hit but I wouldn't have known it hit on the machine I was on literally about 10 minutes after I left.  If I'd gone back to that machine and tried again, it would have been me.  

I was crushed about that for a few days but I'm getting back to not worrying about it.  My day will come.  

We're going back to Atlantis tomorrow because the gift shop has Black Friday sale prices and I always like looking for things during the sale.  

On Sunday, J. is heading to Sacramento for a concert with his best friend R. .  They will enjoy dinner together and will share a hotel room.  It's The Beatles Live 'White Album' which they are both looking forward to.  

The neighborhood is filling up with cars - neighbors hosting.  Our closest neighbors are in France and are posting the most amazing pics of their adventures.  

It's a fairly usual Thanksgiving - dishwasher running again.  I already feel stuffed but I know I will eat more!  I nibble on the stuffing as it's in process.  And J. had to go to Savemart quickly for a couple things I didn't get in our Walmart order and he brought me a glazed donut.  It was not a great donut but I ate it gladly. 

I'm watching all the Harry Potter movies!  It's so fun to remember how much the boys loved the books and the movies.  It's a fun walk down memory lane.  When we cleaned out some books, J. asked 'why are there two of this Harry Potter book'?  I said 'because when the new books would come out, I'd buy two - so B. could read right away and then H. (if he wanted to) and I'd read the 2nd book as soon as we got them.  We donated all the duplicates we had except one - I just never wanted to have to wait to read them because we all loved them so much.  

Wishing you and yours a wonderful Thanksgiving.  I am blessed by all of you dear readers and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for continuing to follow my musings.  Even if it's only a now and then read. 

Way to Go J.!!

I swore I wouldn't mention anything casino related for a good long while on these pages - but today was too epic to not mention. 

In spite of crushing losses the past few weeks (mostly @ Atlantis), we trekked there today for a Black Jack Tournament.  We've started signing J. up for them because he loves to play and how often do you get $10,000 in play to try to beat the house?  I almost stayed home - didn't remember until we were enroute that it is also a 'swipe (your card) and win' free play event today, too.  My free play was (only) $75 but oh well.  I'll take it. 

His round time was 1PM and we arrived a little before 12:30.  We didn't know there was a huge event at the Reno Conference Center (right next to Atlantis) so finding parking took a while.  J. dropped me off 'cuz I truly get so stressed out driving around a parking lot looking for a space. 

He headed up to start the tournament and I played at an older newly fave machine - kept myself going for a long time on not too much money.  Our host came by and got an earful from me about our recent experiences there.  While she couldn't really flat out confirm ('cuz she's a host after all and her employer is the house), she confirmed that she's hearing from a lot of players who are having similar experiences.  It's heartbreaking as long time Atlantis players/fans - you can't believe it's happening so you keep thinking any minute the machine will 'fix it' and you'll start hitting something.  Anything.  But no.  Mostly not much at all.  Going home down over and over is absolutely no fun. It was good to talk to her and get some feelings off my chest.  I know/see/realize there are big changes happening to the place she works and though she can't really talk about it, her responses let me know I'm not wrong.  The payback ratios are changing drastically to be better for the house.  

And one of the things our host did share is that the casino discontinued the technology that gives her notice if her players are in the house.  No more.  Cost saving change she said.  So she will only know we (or any of her assigned players) are there if we have RSVP'd for an event (like the tournament) or she happens to run into us.  Really?  I told her there's no more telling change than that - take away the only way a host knows a player is there - to save how much money?  

I told her we anticipate making changes in 2022 - to play more locally because while they don't offer all the events, etc. Atlantis does, they also seem to have way better odds for the player these days.  

J. let me know he advanced to the next round - which meant he'd have to kill 2+ hours between rounds.  He headed to the buffet.  I stayed at my machine.  He checked in before he headed upstairs.  I finally started moving to other machines, swearing I wouldn't play Dragonlinks there today.  But....I did go to Dragonlink.  Grabbed the machine with a $1,000 topped out Major - and it hit!  $1,102 was the final round total - and there were other winning rounds both before and after that helped get me back to more than even.  I was stoked!  

I shared the win with J. and he wrote back 'Yay! I'm going to be a bit longer'.  I replied 'Yay for you, too'.  I thought he'd moved on to another round which was fantastic!

Not much later, he called me and said 'we decided we would prefer cash vs. free play, right'?  And I said 'well that depends on how much you've won'.  He said 'how many fingers do you have'?  I said 'how much'.  He said 'I won the tournament'.  I said (loudly) YOU WON $10,000!!  Seriously?  WOOT WOOT!  He texted me the 'bit longer' at 5:02PM and I sent him the pic of my win at 4:59....

It was a monstrously epic amazing day!!  

And the best part of the day was being able to let B. know 'live' (once we were home) 'cuz he's back from maneuvers!!  Another HUGE WOOT WOOT for the day.  

Making a Change (Most Likely)

I think I'm going to be making a huge change in 2022.  Another horrible day at Atlantis.  Zero fun, plenty of loss.  I told J. on the way home 'I have so many other things to feel incredibly sad about - I don't want to continue to feel sad weekly over free play and $30 worth of food'.  

We may end up not playing enough to keep all the perks we have now - but we've decided that will be OK. I was most worried about J.'s golf tournament next Spring but he said he could always play at those courses on his own - there was only one course that's private.  All the others would still be available to him - just not the tournament perks and prizes. 

We'll see.  I've talked with a lot of other loyal Atlantis players who are experiencing the same thing - including a person I see playing often who shared with me that he lost $15,000 over the past week.  Yikes!  That's incredibly bad. That loss rate is hard to explain - and I think that's what is so tricky about the change.  Long time loyal locals like me who have always played there because the wins keep you going....only there are few wins these days.  It's such a huge change - it's easy to keep playing because it's so 'usual' for the game to eventually start paying.  

I am honestly liking the idea of not trekking to Reno as often.  I'm sure we'll still go.  We have a lot of comps and we will use them.  B. and his friend R. will be spending a night there in December when B. is here because they have a really fun evening together and it's a treat for them both.  But removing the (self inflicted) pressure of playing and losing (as things appear to stand now) is something I think I need to do.

Big Steps

We signed off on our trust documents this morning and sent the signature page off to our attorney.  

We Zoom called with her yesterday and as we talked, she realized that we are still trying to figure out what we want to do.  I keep reminding J. (and myself) that we need to plan based on what we know today.  We can't assume everything will be fine and we can't assume we will be on the planet years from now.  So based on today, what do we want to do.  

We couldn't agree to decide.  Our attorney said 'here's what we need to do.  You both need to sign the trust documents for the way we had things planned before you knew H. was homeless.  Because at the moment, if anything happens to you both before that plan is signed off, your 'old' trust would be the trust that would be in place - and that trust splits everything 50/50 with no protections related to H.'s addiction issues.'  She was right.  It's not the perfect solution - we still aren't sure there will ever be a perfect solution - but at the very least, there is verbiage in place regarding how H.'s share is handled.  And we needed to get that done.

Now we can talk things through with B. when he visits and (likely) make some tweeks at a later date - and continue tweeking if needed over the upcoming years.  

I've spent the morning cleaning out files and getting a handle on the paperwork in the office.  It's never ending but it's OK.  Keeps me busy. Found some of H.'s writings from his rehab in 2018.  Re-reading it and thinking 'was he ever serious about not using?  I'm not sure he ever was, really'.  Time to let that stuff go. 

I'm suffering from what I can only describe as 'afraid to play slots' - 'cuz I feel sure I will lose and I don't want to.  I know...you're thinking 'duh, Majah'.  But...I'm pretty low on funds at the moment which means I'm betting like I will lose.  Sure, you can do 50 cent spins for hours and hit things here and there.  But...you don't win much betting minimum. 

I need a win that puts me back to being pretty flush.  It will happen.  No idea when but it will.  

We're at the end of the calendar year when we try desperately to not create any new tax obligations.  But when most of your money is in pre-tax retirement accounts, everything feels like it will create a tax obligation.  

It's a nice problem to have, I know.  Blessings abound.  It's just the mechanics that get hard this time of year.  

J. is getting a hip replacement ASAP.  Bless his heart he has spent days getting tests done, hand-delivering documents between the surgeon's office and his primary care doc.  He is in terrible pain pretty much all the time - even sitting is painful at this point - so he really wants to get the procedure done.  He had hoped to do early December - but after all the stuff was done to schedule, they had 12/20 as the date and that's not happening.  Not right before Christmas when B. is here.  So now we wait again for them to determine the date and we're getting nervous that it's going to be February or March.  That means golf will be off the table for most of Spring....and that's not fun for J. .  

Medical stuff gobbles up lots of time as retirees.  

Using leftover pulled pork and making pulled pork chili and pulled pork nachos for dinner this week.  I've got to get to the grocery store for a few key items.  

Loving the Internet

 I commented to J. 'hey, we should go to Walmart to look for some Christmas decorations to hang on the iron fence!'.  He was ready.  

(Backstory:  last year, a couple of the neighbors on the opposite side of the 12th tees hung all sorts of beautiful decorations on the fence....and we added rope lights laced along the top of the fence upon realizing we were missing a HUGE decor opportunity.  I vowed to add some decorations next year - and that is coming up faster than we can imagine!).  

I decided to try on the website first and scored!  I got two decorations from Walmart to be delivered before Thanksgiving.  Found 3 more at Target - also delivered before Thanksgiving.  We didn't have to leave the house!!  Woot woot.

I think I like rarely leaving the house more than I like to admit.  

Then I remembered that I wanted to get plastic ornament hangers for the tree - last year, we never hung ornaments because I was worried about the cats.  I ended up just putting a giant bag of bows (the kind you use for gift wrapping) in the branches of the tree.  It was pretty!  So...went back to Walmart's site and ordered plastic hooks and zip ties (enough to last the rest of our lives, most likely).  Also found 10 super cute penguins - not sure how we would use them but even J. said 'order them!  We'll see how we can incorporate them and if not, we'll return them'.  Got to love a man who indulges his wife and likes penguins!  

I am ready to do it up BIG this year!  So excited to have B. here!  

We have a call with our estate lawyer tomorrow - a call we need to have to hash out approaches but at the same time, I just dread it all.  We are struggling to agree on an 'approach' - wishing it all weren't so damn hard but it is.  

We ordered a small fresh turkey from the meat company down the street and while we know it will be too big for the two of us, I plan to make huge batches of 'other stuff' to freeze.  Turkey enchiladas, turkey tettrazini, etc. - I'm planning a massive grocery shop to have everything we need to do some freezer batch cooking.   

Did I share the lobster story yet?  I can't remember.  When B. visits, we try to do a 'surf and turf' night.  Delicious steak, lobster, good wine.  We all cook together and eat ourselves into (practically) comas.  

J. went to Costco a couple weeks ago and went to the meat department to request a box of frozen lobster tails.  Last year, we found the box in the frozen meat case on our own and bought one.  Not cheap but we were able to give lobster tails to B.'s friend R. to enjoy as well as have lots to use in other dishes.  So..we kept looking and looking for the box of lobster tails with no luck.  Found shrink wrapped lobster tails (in styrofoam tray) - 3 tails in a package - but they were shown as 'previously frozen' and we don't want to risk the tails not being OK so we didn't want to buy them packaged that way.  

J. buzzed the meat department on one of his visits and the person said 'we have boxes - I'll have to get my manager's approval to sell you a full box'.  It took a while but....they did it.  Only it was TEN POUNDS of frozen tails vs. the five pounds from prior boxed purchases - so we have A LOT of lobster.  I'll be searching for recipes to use it - and we plan to gift some to our neighbors and our hair dresser for Christmas!  Wine & lobster!  

B. and I are also planning to make something complex and decadent for Christmas dinner dessert so I need to pull down all my Great British Baking show cookbooks and come up with a plan.  Maybe a Pavlova! Or a Christmas Yule log!  Or both!!  

Can you tell I'm getting in the spirit!!??

Reflection

I puttered around the house after we returned from Reno yesterday.  Always plenty to do.  I'd made a quick trip to Savemart last week and they were having their 5 for $5 - such a great deal to stock up on meat items for (often) half off or more!  I got a lot of boneless pork ribs and boneless pork chops.  I didn't want to risk wasting the meat so I got ribs going - easy slow bake in the oven, baste with BBQ sauce and bake another hour - they were delicious!  

This just showed up in my Facebook feed and I needed it.

 

There is always something good to come out of whatever things happen.  Time to reflect on this very blessed life.  Confirmation that every experience has learnings intrinsic in wherever you are at that moment.  I don't mean it to sound preachy or flippant.  But this was a reminder I needed - to recognize the learnings from whatever is happening.  

It's hard so much these days and I am struggling more than I like to admit about H. .  The hardness of all the stuff I feel and think about him every minute of every day really makes anything hard even more so. I feel sad about simple things but the sadness of those simple things gets magnified so incredibly out of whack.  

I had a good weekend of escaping - the thing I used to love doing when we lived in California.  Spent a weekend playing slots, having beers, meeting people, playing with friends, spending time with J. .  It was a great, fun 'escape' of a weekend and those don't happen much these days since we live here now!  No more four hour drives to get to my happy place - 30 minutes and I'm there!  

I live to play another day!  And a Big Win is always just one spin away!  
 

Wrong Place at the Wrong Time

Seemingly every machine I played this weekend, I was at the wrong machine at the wrong time.  Lost a lot and it's giving me pause.  Pausing is good, I think.  I do love to play.  Lesson learned is one I've known previously - don't attend 'drawings' and stay two nights for 'events'.  This stay was the first one we've had with Atlantis in a very long time - booked it because I have had decent luck and was feeling 'good' about having the resources to play more during a weekend stay.  But boy, howdy - it was awful.  

No more weekend stays.  (Except New Year's Eve.  We aren't missing that event even if it is on a weekend).  

I'm reminding myself (a lot) how blessed we are financially to have the money available to play full tilt for a few days.  We are very blessed.  

At the off ramp on Friday, I gave $20 to a young woman standing with a sign 'need help'.  I rarely do that...but I've seen her before.  Always with a bright smile.  As I handed her the $20, she shouted out 'I promise I will pay it forward as soon as I'm able'.  And I believe her.  I finished the drive down the street to the casino with a huge lump in my throat and a hurting heart.  Hoping someone is helping H. so he can have food.  While knowing he would prioritize drugs over food.  

There are deaths reported out of Houston at a concert event.  H.'s friend P. messaged me this morning asking if we could please try to check on him.  The artist was one he likes and she said she had a bad feeling.  I told her we would try to reach out to Simon again this week to see if he's seen H. - but we were taking the 'no news is good news' approach for now.  No other option, really, since we have no way to contact him directly.  

The 4th marked two months since we last had any contact with him.  

The 5th marked the two year mark of our being residents of Nevada.  Time flies.  I remembered my drive out of Tracy with the cats.  

B. is on maneuvers again.  Guess everyone was pretty upset to be maneuvering again so soon.  These soldiers are working constantly to practice things they might need to do someday and it's long, hard days.  Mentally and physically exhausting.  To be back out again for days on end is a hard thing to do, I think.  But it will get B. time off at Christmas and yay to that!  

At dinner last night, J. casually mentioned 'B. is changing duty stations in June'.  New Jersey.  HUH?  Yikes.  That's a LONG way away.   

Add 'must visit B. in Nashville' to the list of things we want to do in Spring.  He's wanted us to come visit forever and now we really must!!  

I'm hoping his new duty station is close enough to visit the Cake Boss' bakery in Hoboken!! 

40 MPH Gusts

HUGE winds here yesterday.  I said to J. 'I think we need to go out and take the bird baths down' - and 10 minutes later, we lost a bird bath.  Blew the bowl off the rock we wedged it on and shattered.  Darn it!  

And the porta potty for the construction next door blew over as well.  

I love having the wind gauge because we know exactly how strong the winds are.  

We drove to Reno and took the back roads - stayed off the high bridges.  Relieved to see a mass of 18 wheelers pulled off the freeway waiting it out.  That's the first time we've seen the high wind warning for truckers to exit in effect and they complied.  

Had fun at Atlantis and hit a Maxi jackpot on Mighty Cash Ultra - which is fast becoming my new favorite and will keep me mostly away from Dragonlink this weekend.  

J. is doing a bunch of appointments and tests today to hopefully get cleared for hip replacement surgery in early December.  Fingers crossed the timing will work out.  It's a carefully orchestrated process and if you don't follow the process Medicare may not cover the procedure.  

I was super excited last night to realize that I can bend my thumb at the first knuckle for the first time in months.  It was stiff and not bending when I woke up this morning but it's loosening up already and is back to bending a bit.  I am so happy about it - 

I'm heading to Atlantis in a bit with a suitcase - staying tonight and likely tomorrow night.  J. will join me tomorrow.  Hoping for some big wins but at least know I will be having fun relaxing a bit in my happy place.  

Wishing everyone a great weekend, including me and my best beloved.

Sparkly House

 Cleaning crew was here today and it feels so lovely to be sitting here enjoying a sparkly (from top to bottom) house!  They did a really good job - three ladies.  When I saw them wiping all the doors and door frames, I knew they were doing a great job.  

I ventured to a hand surgeon this morning - got a steroid shot in my thumb.  He used a freezing spray on the thumb first (where he planned to inject) and then did the shot which also had lidocaine in it.  My thumb has been numb but it's coming back to feeling - and it hurts like the dickens at the moment but hopefully will feel much better tomorrow.  I don't have any more movement yet - but that might take time.  I'll do a follow-up visit in a few weeks.  If the thumb is still stuck, he will do an easy in-office surgical procedure which will fix it for sure.  

This week has felt 'busy' with a host of happenings - tomorrow, we're back to leisure time.  Atlantis for free play (drastically reduced which pisses me off - little by little, Atlantis is losing us.  Found out yesterday I went up another player level at the local Carson casino I play at weekly and I'm super happy about that). Back to Atlantis on Friday for a two night stay - and I'm sneaking in Friday night as a solo event which I'm super excited about.  I haven't had a fun night in a casino in a long time and it feels like more of a 'treat' to be able to play long into the night.  Of course, I can do that if/when J. is with me, too, of course....but my 'get away' trips have always been some 'me' time that I really need.  

We're having a bevy of discussions about finalizing our estate plan - made even more complex as we navigate a son who is homeless and choosing to remain out of contact. When we finally finalize those documents, I plan another overnight stay at Atlantis and will feel 'at ease' about things for the first time in a very long time. 

I get pretty emotional at times - usually as I'm saying my pre-sleep affirmations and prayers.  Reflecting back on the last call from H..  I remind myself I wouldn't have done anything different even if I'd known what we found out shortly after that call.  But it was faster than I wish it had been for a 'last call in a long time'.  

I say that while also feeling strongly that it's probably best we aren't in touch.  We can't 'support' the decisions he's made that led to his status.  Can't fathom or accept as OK the 9+ months of lying.  These lies weren't little white lies - they were mammoth 'shows' - intricately shared.  The level of detail...it's mind boggling.  Absolutely won't offer any help or support of any kind going forward other than confirming the one true thing:  we love him.  Forever and always and unconditionally.  He said to me at some point in the weeks leading up to that call 'Mom, no matter what happens, I love you.  Forever and always'.  

We've done a lot of yard stuff this week - starting to prune back the blossoming plants to get them ready for winter.  We can (and will) do some trimming in Spring but some plants need to be cut back to avoid looking awful for months.  Also doing a lot of stone repair - tossing stones that have migrated out of the area they started in - it's a lot of deep bending and squats and boy, do I feel it in my legs at the end of the day.  

J.'s back from Costco.  Gotta run!