Surviving Survivor

We're watching the season premiere of Survivor...and can I just put this out in the cosmos....it is boring.  Really boring.  I haven't really been 'into' this show for a long time but tonight, it just feels like slow torture.  And it's an hour and a half.

And then it's followed by Amazing Race - another 'used to love it but now, not really' hour and a half.

But my best beloved DOES love them both...so we will watch.  Or he will watch and I will do computer stuff until sheer boredom sends me to be.  Where I will fall asleep watching TV as I have for the past couple nights.

Yesterday morning, I woke up to find my left eye bright red - a broken blood vessel had spread across the white part.  Today, it's still moving and is now bright red pretty much all under the iris...from one side to another.

I've had some pain that feels sinusy - and I feel totally fine other than itchy throat and headache.  I'm fine.  But I look like Frankenstein.

I am pleased to report that one of the big reports is done as of today and the second even bigger big report is well under way.  Fingers crossed that even with many meetings wedged in this week, I will get things done before the weekend and not feel compelled to work.  That's my goal:  get it done by Friday at 5 so I can enjoy the weekend.

We think we are signing loan docs here at home at noon tomorrow.  I sure hope that's right.  It's been dragging out forever - just before 5PM today, J. found out the lender was NOW requesting proof that we've paid our homeowners insurance for the year.  Really?  Geez.  But OK. Thanks to CSAA insurance, we had a pdf document confirming the policy is paid in full for the remainder of the policy term - and I'm sure if we'd needed it, CSAA could have confirmed that we historically have always paid our premium in full annually.  For basically forever.  They want us to jump through hoops, we'll jump!

J. is playing in a golf tournament on Saturday morning and then attending a concert on Saturday night.  Then he's playing music at church on Sunday.  He will be exhausted by Sunday afternoon!

He's one of those irritating (LOL) retired people who are so busy, they don't know how they ever worked.

We have additional garden plants en route from High Country Gardens and I can't wait to get them in the ground.  The gardener has been helping us fix a lot of sprinkler issues and he's going to update the drip system in the front beds.  I've got some miniature lavender plants along with some other higher plants to go in back of the lavender to update the two small beds on either side of the garage.  We removed the boring shrubs that were there and I'm looking forward to having some color in the front of the house.  Other color also arriving to be added.

I'm already fighting off sleepiness so looks like falling asleep in bed watching TV is imminent.

Sweetest Man Alive

In the not quite 25 years I've been married to my sweet husband, I've learned a thing or two.  He is a wonderful person - fun, smart, kind to his core.  He treats me like a princess and has taught his sons to do the same.  He is selfless and generous to a fault.  I'm very lucky.  But I've learned that some things don't come naturally to him.  He may not always be the most romantic person - and that doesn't mean he's not loving.  He's very loving.  It's just that in the 'surprising' me and/or making things special, sometimes he needs a nudge.  It's OK.  I've learned to nudge when nudging is needed.  

I had planned at trip to Tiffany's in Paris - but gave that up in exchange for going to Disneyland Paris. I was thinking our plan was to spend the day of our actual anniversary at the park.  It was a fair trade. I have plenty of baubles and the time to go to a Disneyland park is a rare thing - so I was looking forward to spending our anniversary there.  

The drive to Jackson was beautiful.  Everything's greening up and the cows and horses just look so happy to be grazing on an abundance of new grass.  The skies were a bit cloudy but then sunny and bright blue.  It was a lovely drive - it's one of the best parts of heading up there.  

During the drive, I said 'I wondered if you'd be OK if I kept an eye out while we are in Paris and maybe try to find a not too expensive ring to commemorate our anniversary.  Like a semi-precious stone kind of thing'?  No reply.  Highly unusual.  He begrudges me nothing.  I thought 'is it the money'?  (No way that is an issue...but.....).  I said 'so?'.  And he said (after a bit) 'um, it's possible that I'm a little ahead of you'.  

And then, even though he wasn't sure what to do - wanting desperately to surprise me completely but realizing that if he didn't give me a peek into his scheming.. he sure didn't want me to not know what he was thinking of lest I mess it up by making plans of my own  - he spilled a 'plan' he's been formulating and researching.  Yes, there will be rings. (Hoping to be sterling silver for our silver anniversary).  And an informal (between us) renewal of our wedding vows.  In an amazing location - Notre Dame Cathedral.  With a photographer.  

I still tear up when I think about it.  He said 'I wanted to make it up to you for not making the proposal what it should have been'.  He knows me so well.  I love him so much and wouldn't trade the last 25 years for anything - but there are times when stories of romantic proposals make me wistful and a little sad.  For never having that 'oh my God' moment about binding my life with his forever. 

I had that moment today - as we pulled into the casino valet parking.  This man has given very careful thought and consideration to make our 25th anniversary magical - and no French speaking mouse will be involved.  :-)  I still tear up when I think about it - just the sweetest, most heartfelt thing he could have possibly done.  

While I feel it has sure added a lot of complexity to some things (I will need a dress, I think.  Right?  I should wear a dress.  And a dress means shoes.  And lingerie.  Slips.  Etc. Yikes.  I've got a lot of shopping to do) it will be a wonderful memory and will make the day just so, so special.  

And yes, we're stilling going to the park - just the day before our anniversary instead of the day of. 

J., thank you for telling me what you were thinking of doing - and thanks for all the work you've done to make it so amazing.  I am so happy to know that the 25th anniversary of the day we became man and wife means as much to you as it does to me and that like me, you want to celebrate it with something really special.  While surprising me would have been amazing (I'm not even slightly disappointed that I know...I'm just so in awe of your planning it all), I'm overjoyed to be in on the planning and now look forward to our trip even more than I was....and that's pretty hard to believe since we're both pretty excited about it.  Your thoughtfulness and ideas make me feel so special and I'm so blessed to be your wife.  Thank you so much for loving me and wanting to make the day so amazing.  I can't wait! 

Pre-Paris

Read that as Pre-pair-eee.  Emphasis on the eee.  :-)

Trip prep is officially on with the purchase of a few missing small size travel things and a People magazine.  I plan to buy one or two magazines a week up until we leave 'cuz 15 hours times 2 on planes to/from is a lot of time to kill, even with built in TV, plenty of movies, sleeping some, etc..

I'm trying for the light ones (vs. Vogue or In Style).  Might splurge on one of those in the airport in Atlanta in prep for the flight to Paris.  But will also have books on my Kindle so plenty to read.  It's just something about a paper copy that means 'we're going on a trip!'.

I worked a bit this morning - first weekend day of work that I've counted on my attendance calendar since June.  I felt a little sad this morning knowing that I did need to (and planned to) go in - but then I remembered that I've had such a massive swing towards more balance in the past seven months, a few weekend days here and there is no big deal.  Weekend days are rare now vs. the norm they were for a couple years - so I went in, got right to what needed to be done and made huge progress. Quiet, no interruptions, no meetings, no phone calls.  I will work at home a couple of hours tomorrow morning and will head into the week feeling 'on track' for the report deadline looming.

And another board meeting on the horizon.  Time goes so quickly.

Haircut (I could go on and on about how much fun time with my stylist is....but suffice it to say that we laugh through the entire 1/2 hour and time flies).  Found two blouses on sale, used a coupon and a $10 reward coupon so the purchase was a huge bargain!  Then off to Target for a few quick items (which is where the travel size items and magazine were purchased).  Home in time to see J. off as he took my car to Costco for a few items, then gassed up.  We are heading to Jackson tomorrow for an afternoon of fun and a nice dinner.

And to finish off a busy, accomplishment filled day, I just completed filing the boys' taxes.  They are well on their way to having refunds in their accounts - and I waived my customary fee.  (Just kidding. I didn't charge them.  But I did make them each pay the $19.99 e-filing fee for their state return).

On the other screen, I have a cart full of plants awaiting ordering.  We pulled out a lot of bedding plants and still have some blank spots that need filling.  I love the High Country Gardens site - the plants we purchased from them and planted in late summer have miraculously survived a very cold winter and will be enjoying a huge growth spurt as soon as consistent warmth happens.  They arrive in excellent condition and take transplanting so much better than the Park Seed plants we've purchased in the past.

We're watching a Good Wife marathon on the Hallmark channel and just realized that it's been a full-day marathon and we've missed most of the it!  Darn it!

Cousin

In July, 2010, I traveled to Las Vegas to meet my cousin and her family for a weekend.  It was a big deal on many levels.  H. had just come home from his month in a rehab facility and I was a nervous wreck about leaving him.  And on a completely different level, I was very excited and a teeny bit nervous to meet my cousin.  We were around the same age but had never met.  Via Facebook, we had started to be in touch more and found ourselves strangely, amazingly alike.  Our temperaments, our outlook on life and the things it throws at you.  I was so excited to meet her but so nervous - would we really like each other as much in person?  Would we easily fill conversations and pass time easily?  Or would the awkwardness of the distance (created by geography, sibling relationships [her dad was my mom's youngest sibling and they were not close - ever], her parent's divorce...all sorts of things) overwhelm us?

I went to Vegas with high hopes - and found a kindred spirit.  It was like she was me.  We marveled at how 'alike' we felt.  I got to know her family and we spent some really fun times...went to the outlet mall, passed the time gambling.  It was a fun few days and then they returned to Oklahoma City.  I was so glad I went.  Grateful to have met her in person - and glad that now, we had faces and actual time together to add to our long-distance friendship.

We've kept in touch.  We always picked up right where we left off as if there was no geographical distance or time passing.  She was diagnosed with leukemia - which she said was actually a relief - to finally know what was causing the repetitive infections and illnesses she was experiencing.  A bone marrow transplant was planned - and executed - and hopes were high that she would be fine.

I really thought she would be fine.

My cousin D. died on Saturday.  Valentine's Day.  I found out via a phone call from another Oklahoma cousin.  I was shocked and stunned and dismayed.  She took a turn for the worse and her organs started shutting down.  And she died.

I am sad for her husband and her immediate family - who lost someone they cherished and saw every single day.  I am thinking of her mom and her sister - knowing their hearts are breaking.  I'm sorry for her co-workers and the company she worked for who lost a shining light. She was gifted and talented and fun and will be impossible to replace in terms of what she brought to the company.  And to her friends and family.  She was a ray of sunshine wherever she went and she gave new meaning to the term 'fighting for life'.  She never complained.  Never wavered in her courage and faith that she would beat the cancer and survive.  Always positive - posting updates on her Carebridge page that provided the details of what was happening - without an ounce of pity or whining or neediness.  She just had a gift for being one of the most positive people I've ever met.

I miss her.  And I say that completely acknowledging that my loss is insignificant compare to those whom she spent every day with.

Still, the world feels different without her on the planet.

There is great comfort in our faith which says I will see her again.  I'm sure of that.  She's with her dad and my mom and dad, her Uncle M. - and our wonderful grandparents.  Plenty of other family we miss who I'm sure welcomed her.  And someday, I'll see her again and it will be like it always was when we'd chat - no time has passed and we just pick up where we left off.

D., I love you very much and miss you.  Sending love, prayers and comfort to her family and friends. Bright, shining lights like her never go away....we just have to carry them with us in our hearts forever.  Until we see her again.

Freezer Living

J. and I decided to live off the freezer for the next couple weeks.  Mainly to just use things up before we go to Paris - which will (not coincidentally) make space to stock up for H. being home alone for 10 days.  It won't be the healthiest stuff he's eaten - no scratch cooking like we tend to do these days....shying away from most processed food - but it will be things he will eat and can put together himself.  He actually made a grilled cheese himself.  I know.  You're thinking 'seriously?  Isn't he 21+ years old?'.  Indeed he is.  But he does not like to 'cook'.  And even when we cook, he tends to gravitate for things he likes....so.  He will survive on what's he's used to, pretty much.

He'll be left with well stocked freezers and a list of easy to prepare 'meals'. It's the least we can do.

He will likely eat a lot of junk food while we are gone - and he'll be ready for a home cooked meal when we get home.  I'm sure post-jet-lag resolution, I will oblige him.  I love to cook for my guys.

So...back to the purpose of this post.  I just have to proclaim that spaghetti sauce that has been frozen and then thawed is so delectably delicious.  WAY better than I remember it being when we first made it.  Glad that we are getting into the habit of making double batches of things and freezing 'cuz having homemade, delicious sauce available has been a 'treat' and it wouldn't have been nearly as good if we'd thrown it together on a weeknight.  No long simmering possible.  Well, I guess it IS possible since my husband is home - but I'm the cook...and good sauce is my secret weapon.  [J. also cooks plenty...I get a lot of joy creating good sauce!].

It's also lovely that my sweet hubby knows that I like my pasta 'tossed' with the sauce....not ladled on top of a plate of pasta.  Coating the pasta with the sauce and then topping with grated cheese gets the sauce in every nook and cranny and makes it just delicious.

Two delicious dinner nights in a row of spaghetti.  Tomorrow is bean and pork burritos.

J. is so good to me.  Last night, as planned, he made me a Blackberry Lemon Drop martini.  The first one was a little too sweet - which surprised him 'cuz I like sweet drinks.  I drank a couple sips and he took it back.  The second one was better.  I'm sure we will perfect our preferences.

After giving away TONS of drink ware at the end of the year, he said he thinks we need to get a couple martini glasses.  We'll see....

No, we didn't make a third.  It was a work night.  If it had been Friday evening, then.....

4 Day Work Week(s)

The Monday holidays are lovely but the ensuing 4 days spent trying to cram 5 days of work into them?  Not so much.  Still, it would be great if we went to 4 day work weeks all the time.  I could get used to that extra day - which usually finds me uber productive.

I walked the dog again last night, though not close to a mile.  It was approaching dark, a little chilly and she had three shots yesterday (poor baby) and wasn't as brisk in her pace...so we walked to the park and back.  Nothing spectacular but hey!  I walked the dog two days in a row and that's progress!

My sweet hubby procured $50 in supplies to make me a Blackberry Lemon Drop martini - which we haven't tried yet.  There are lots of recipes so we bought supplies to try a couple different methods.  I read about infusing blackberries into vodka in a mason jar but haven't taken it to that level - yet. Could happen, though.  Maybe tonight.

We have been enjoying wine with dinner the past couple nights - a delicious Cabernet.  Another trend.

Let's walk the dog and drink nightly!

We got our Costco Amex rebate - and ponder what will happen when the partnership between Amex and Costco ends this time next year.  I'm sure there will be some other 'partner' card but we'll see. We will miss the familiar Costco Amex card in our wallets.  I think the decline in Amex's stock price upon the news of the ending partnership is reflective of just how powerful big box stores are...though I also secretly applaud Amex for sticking to their guns and not accepting a discount that doesn't make business sense for them.  No matter how large Costco is, if Amex can't make some profit on their partnership, it's not worth doing.

We're hoping to stretch that rebate into April which shouldn't be too hard considering February is winding down and two weeks of March will find us in Paris!  Though stocking up the food locker for H. will put a dent in that -

I've also awakened at 5AM two days in a row...but here it is 6:24 and I've yet to shower.  Better get there soon -

It's Wednesday which I have to keep reminding myself.  4 day weeks throw off my head's calendar.

.9 Round Up

Feeling productive today - a holiday, technically.  I worked for a few hours - getting ready for a very hectic couple of weeks so took the time to organize, list, get started on two of the huge things that need doing this week.  Our MOT director phoned me to let me know the landscaping company was applying weed abatement to our field - he didn't want me to worry when I went out and saw people on the field.

Home by 2 and then J. and I took our dogarini out for a walk.  She had her ears back and set a brisk pace - until we walked her close to a mile.  The last block or so, her pace was definitely down.  So was mine - my legs felt jello-like so I can't imagine what her little legs felt like.  Enjoyed getting outside for some Vitamin D exposure.  Weather clear and sunny and while I'm a little cold inside (necessitating a light sweatshirt over my short sleeve top), the sweatshirt was quickly off at the start of the walk.

With J.'s help, I'm starting in on doing taxes for the two young men.  Awaiting B. sending his forms to us via a pdf attachment.

Last night, we made cheese grits and short ribs for dinner.  Tonight, we are enjoying Mexican (for H.) and sushi for J. and I.  The restaurants are next to each other and H. wasn't feeling sushi (unusual for him) so easy enough to get him Mexican food.  We said "Mikasa" and his mind thought "Mexican"....it's not.  But we made it so.

His job hunt begins this week and I've issued an order:  find any job.  Do not be picky.  Do not wait for the 'perfect' job.  Be a bagger at Raley's if you have to....but find something.  It's not even the $ - it's needing/wanting him to be busier so that spending 14 hours a day playing video games and partying with friends becomes a rare occurrence instead of the daily norm.

Sushi is here!!

Anatomy of a Keurig Cup

A few weeks ago, I took on recycling K-cups.  It was bothering me to toss the plastic cups in the trash after each brew...plastic, coffee grounds.  So I decided to start recycling.

What somewhat prompted this was a discussion I had with a parent (at a committee meeting a few weeks ago) about composting.  She and her husband have four compost piles and they compost pretty much everything.  Top of her list was coffee grounds - as well as leftover pots of coffee.  She gave me many helpful hints on what to do to break down waste more quickly and since then, I've been doing a better job of composting.  I turn the bin pretty frequently and keep it pretty moist.  And I've added lots of green weekly along with the brown (leaves, etc.).  It seems to be working.  While J. and H. were gone, I added quite a bit to the bin but it's already starting to break down a bit.  Keeping the bin moist (the lady I spoke to says she empties any partially used bottled water; glasses of water; coffee; tea to their bin regularly) has really helped.

My K-cup recycling has also explained why K-cups are so expensive!  Inside each is a tiny filter - like a coffee pot basket filter only the size of the cup.  The grounds are inside the tiny filter which is inside the plastic cup!  So no wonder they are expensive 'cuz that's a lot to create in order to brew a beverage.  I pull out the grounds and then tear out the inside filter as well - it's all compostable.  Then rinse the plastic out and recycle those in our plastic recycle bin.

It's another three day weekend - the last break until the long slide into Spring break in April.  We have no particular plans.

Yes, it's Valentine's Day!  We are heading to Dave Wong's for Chinese takeout tonight but other than that, we are not spending money on cards, etc. - preferring to enjoy a really good meal in Paris for our anniversary and a belated V-day celebration.  Lots of friends at work were heading to overnight getaways with their spouses this weekend - making me wish we'd thought of that.  But we're spending plenty in a month on eight nights in Paris and that will have to do for now.

Work is getting crazy (on many levels).  My stress-o-meter is in overdrive and my stomach is where I feel it - I'm considering working a bit on Monday just to try to tamp down the growing panic I feel every time I think about what is on my list of 'must dos'.

Enjoyed a wonderful dinner on Thursday with my friend J. - we went to Simply Fondue and had the most delicious dinner AND Blackberry Lemon Drop martinis.  My new favorite drink and J. and I are going to Bev Mo this weekend to procure supplies to make them ourselves!  Of course the best part of the evening was time with my friend!

I'm on H. like a fly on fly paper as he passes the time with friends and stuff.  Forgetting to do everything he's supposed to do - rarely here.  Not looking for a job though he swears he will.  Tells us not to bug him about it or he just will delay further.  (I know - doesn't it make you want to scream?). I'm heading into 'ultimatum' mode - which never goes well and isn't particularly pleasant for anyone. I just don't know what else to do - hoping that once he's been home from Rome a week, he will get his shtick in gear and get going.  A job is required and the sooner the better.

Epic

I give you H.'s souvenir from Rome:

It won't fit in the suitcase or his backpack so it's going to be a carry-on. It's boxed.

He loves it and J. says he's walking around speaking Latin.

Like his jester hat, it will probably end up on the banister cap on the stairs most of the time....

They enjoyed their final day and a nice dinner capped off with champagne.  Heading home in the(ir) morning -

I miss them and will be glad they are home again.

It's raining pretty steadily here today and it's cold and gray.  I'm watching the original Dr. Doolittle - the first movie I ever saw in a theater.  I was 7.  It's a great movie.

Tech Wow

How long ago was it that 'The Blackberry' was all the rage?  I remember vividly reading and hearing about 'emails on a cell phone' and all the 'stars' had them.  Of course, only 'stars' could afford them then.....I thought 'why do we need email on our phones'?

And now?  Emails on a phone are the norm.  As are texts and videos and cameras and games and apps that help you track flights, weather, etc. - amazing many of us carry a powerful computer with us most of the time.  Used for connecting and alarm clocks and entertainment and work.  In our hand!

Keeping in touch with J. and H. as they travel has been easy and fun - we are on text and/or Facebook messenger pretty regularly.  The only hindrance is the time difference because they are sound asleep when I get home from work and I am sleeping when they get up.  But we've managed to catch each other.

This morning, I saw my hubby a couple times at two different places in Rome via live web cam! Couldn't talk to him via the camera, but could see him and watch him wave!  It was priceless.

I am surviving OK without them.  Got a call from PG&E on Thursday night warning of the huge storm(s) approaching.  They've never done that before so I admit to some slight anxiety about the impending weather - but it wasn't that bad.  True, big winds - and it was oddly, strangely warmish and the wind was 'weird' - hard to describe but atypical blustering, even for Tracy.  We got rain last night and again today - and this afternoon, it was bright and sunny and HOT outside while rain poured down.  Amazing sight that I couldn't capture in a picture but wish I could have.

The guys left for the airport hotel on Tuesday around 7ish and I immediately got going on my 'list of things to do when the boys are in Rome'.  My enthusiasm for the list and my productivity level in the evenings has waned a bit - I'm getting up pretty early to give myself plenty of time to get ready and give Chloe attention before work - and I'm getting home later form work 'cuz I take a break mid-day to try to come home and let her out.  It was an insanely busy week at work and while the time flew by, it also felt 'slow' in passing.

It's Saturday and I wish I had more motivation but I'm being thwarted by a bad headache and sore throat that started yesterday.  I think it's just 'sinuses' vs. any real illness but I feel not great nevertheless.  Oh well.  I'm getting a few little things done today and look forward to a good night's sleep.

I have been sleeping pretty well - leaving my door slightly open so IF I hear something, I will know I am really hearing something vs. convincing myself I am hearing something and being afraid to open the door to really see if it's something.  And my sound machine on 'low' so I am likely to hear something that needs hearing - those two simple changes have me sleeping fairly well without my men around.

Chloe is as sweet as she can possibly be and she's doing a really good job being kenneled.  She dutifully trots in to her lair as soon as I brush my teeth in the morning and she knows when I power down the computer at night, it's time for bed.  Just like she does for her Dad when he's here.  (Yes, we are those people who refer to ourselves as the parent of our dog.  She's a part of our family....).

I have a three day weekend and am glad for the extra day off.  I was planning to be off yesterday as well but my week was just too jammed and I couldn't get board prep done without that day.  Oh well. There's plenty to do and I don't mind -

I think I'm going to attempt to make a homemade (well, the crust is pre-made - from Winco - sold in a little bag from the deli department) for lunch.  In honor of my guys traveling adventures.  H. apparently has OD'd on pizza and J. was taking him for a steak dinner tonight - which H. was really excited about.

Ciao for now!

Priceless

Via text from the Roman travelers:

"Lunch: two pizzas and two cokes 35 Euros.  Dinner:  liter of wine, a beer, bread, cheese plate, fetuccini bolognesa, lasagna bolognesa 26 Euros.  Pays to do a little research ahead of time".

I added:  'Time with my son in Rome?  Priceless'.

He replied:  Si.

They are having a wonderful time.