Ouch!

We have all received our flu shots. Living with someone who is now considered 'high risk' (diabetic) makes getting it fairly easy. I relaxed my arm, took a deep breath, didn't feel a thing - only now, 3 hours later, I can barely move my left arm. Thankfully, I don't use my left arm much and it should be much improved by tomorrow.

J. and H. got their shots on Tuesday when J. took H. for his annual physical. The doctor rattled off all the other vaccinations the kids could/should get: Hepatitis A and Hepatitis B, the meningitis vaccine. J. said with every shot listed, he could just see H's face get more and more 'concerned'. The kid will jump from the 5th step on our stairs down to the bottom in a running leap - everyday, multiple times a day - but mention getting a shot, and he turns into mush. Acute fear of needles. He had his first 'arm' draw of blood on Tuesday and told J. 'I thought I was going to pass out'. Wanny. Sweet wanny, but still - a lightweight on the needle fear scale.

B. and I went today - a quick stop after work/school. We didn't want to put it off - and we saved $$ by going to our doctor's office instead of getting it at Rite Aid or Safeway Pharmacy. We probably won't even have to pay anything since we're in the group of those who are strongly encouraged to get a shot. Good. Saved some $$.

Of course, I now (think) I feel horrible. Which I actually might - but hard to tell what that's caused by. I am tired. The long weekend was very restful and really helped - but within minutes of entering my office today, the stress and workload quickly overwhelmed me. The State budget is in a free fall (again/still/always - along with the rest of America) and our district budget will be seriously impacted if the Governor's current thoughts on how to 'fix' the issues go through. It will be a long couple months...I sure picked a great time to decide to enter this field as a CBO. Wow. It's challenging.

Are any of you asking what I've been asking myself for days: what exactly did that 'we must do it NOW' bail out package DO, exactly? There has been no stabilization of ANY kind. It is a very scary time. Do I go to the bank and withdraw buckets of cash and stash them in a closet somewhere? We are watching every single penny - and it's not because we 'have to'. But it's been an interesting shift in my thoughts regarding our budget and money in general. These scary times make me calculate things like how much will we make over the next x number of years before y happens? It's become apparent that what we DO have going for us - which may not be true for those who have lost theirs - we both have terrific jobs. Good money, good benefits. And we will (God willing) have these jobs, with this earning power for x number of years. And that capital is what I'm now focusing on keeping. On maximizing. So while I could buy a new purse which I saw and wanted, I'm not buying it. That $$ will come in handy someday and I'll be glad that I limited our purchases to 'need' as much as possible in the next 10-20 years.

Yes, I'm resigned to working another 20 years. I hope I won't have to. But I think I might. And that will be OK. To lower that 'x' factor, I need to be as strictly frugal as possible. And that's the biggest shift in how I think about money I could ever imagine. It's subtle - but it is factoring in to everything we do. And that's not a bad thing. It's been really helping - we are managing well and it feels strangely good to be so careful. Looking for opportunities to save on things we can. I did an online survey and saved $3 on Chloe's shampoo and nail trim this weekend. I did another survey online at Starbucks and was able to treat B. to a totally free frapucinno after we got our shots. Sent in rebates this weekend for $15 off dog and cat food that we bought. Those little things add up - and taking the time to do those small things feels good - small differences can add up and most certainly help.

There are still opportunities for treats. Treating a family member to something that is a nice treat for ALL of us (example: airfare ticket to allow them to be at a family event they otherwise might miss) are things that we are still completely, totally able to do. And will do. Life is too short to not do things that create memories that you'll have forever. All the blessings I've always blogged about are still true - and I have far fewer money issues in my life than many Americans. My blessings continue. The net worth has significantly declined - but my blessings quota continues to incline. So it's all good.

But new purses? Those can wait. Someday, I'll not only buy any purse I want, but also treat myself to a trip to Tiffany's for some bauble that I've always wanted. Someday. Not soon. Not anytime soon. We are in for long recovery time. There's still plenty to pray about - it won't be an easy thing.

I believe we have someone in office who will figure out where all that recovery money is going/went. And will do something about it.