Two Days in a Row!

In honor of another cousin (Hi D.!) who Facebook messaged me to say 'glad your cousin S. scolded you for not blogging 'cuz I've missed you'....I love you both!!  Isn't it amazing how we're miles apart but still 'close' at times?  I appreciate you both read!  My life is so boring I'm shocked...but then, I'd read anything the two of you wrote, too, 'cuz it keeps us updated and in touch.  :Like Christmas cards only more often than annually.  It's a joy to be 'missed' - and thank you both for reading....

(I ramble)...

In honor of D. reaching out, I will shock you and post two days in a row!

Today was a day of reaching out.  Spent most of the day in meetings - some good - some not great. There's so much transition these days - new Superintendent; new procedures; new changes in roles in some department.  It's hard to get folks who are in the thick of it day after day to see that it's not easy ever to change a bunch of stuff around.  But we're going to - and in my role, sometimes my job is to say 'this is the way it is - get on the bus or get off - but decide 'cuz the bus is moving with or without you on it'.  I work very hard at always taking the high road - assume the best of folks (that you know are bad mouthing you to anyone who will listen three seconds after you stop talking to them); build relationships because that's what leaders do (though you know it's futile effort in some cases).  It's not easy.  But oh well.  Things worth doing are worth doing well.

And in a simple twist of my own psyche, I applied the above to me....stepped back and remembered the early days of when my former boss joined us.  He turned the place upside down in the first month of his tenure - and I remember thinking at the time 'he is absolutely nuts if he thinks....  '.  And guess what?  He wasn't nuts.  He was leading.  He saw things that needed doing - and he made them happen. And he counted on his administrators to also make it happen.  Some got on the bus and rode for awhile and left.  Others were never on and fought kicking and screaming for awhile...and left eventually. Maybe some were nudged....that's possible.  Some of us got on, stayed on and learned to help him drive because he needed us to do that.  So we did.

My new boss is a good person.  He's nice.  He doesn't yell or scream.  He's a novice at most of his current responsibilities and he's learning everyday.  I still learn huge amounts of stuff everyday - and I've been at this for close to seven years....but I still remember how hard it was at first when everything was new and the days blurred as you were bombarded with so much information and 'stuff' you suddenly realized you were responsible for.  All while you try to lead people who struggle wanting to be led.

I emailed him an opinion today for the first time.  It was about something he said in a meeting - and I decided that there were other things in the equation to consider so I emailed him my thoughts.  And he came into my office at the end of the day and we talked about it - and Eureka! - he had some perspectives and ideas that I totally had NEVER thought of about it - and it was a great conversation. We appreciated each other's perspectives - and we talked through options - and realized we aren't ready to decide yet...and we'll keep gathering info and reconvene.

He was kind; supportive; humble; appreciative - and I had never seen any of those things when he was a peer in the prior 6.75 years I've known him.

I 'coached' a friend yesterday that we need to take off the glasses that we wore when we knew him as a peer - and put on brand new fresh glasses.  Take away any 'impressions' we have of him; any preconceived ideas about 'how he is'....and start over.  Give him a chance.  He deserves it - because he's who the board chose.  This is his dream - he has the job he dreamed of from when he was fresh out of college and taught for the very first time in front of a class.  He wanted to be the Superintendent of our district - where he started his career and in the town where he grew up and where his parents still live.

I feel proud of myself for taking my own advice - and walking out on a limb - and testing the waters of being 'myself' with him.  I'm not supposed to be his 'yes-person'.  I'm supposed to be the person that provides 'balance' and ideas that round out his decision making process.  That's my job - I support the Superintendent and have to balance that with all the other 'stuff' that makes up my day.

I don't know what our future holds - two months is very 'new'.  But I know that I personally feel a teeny bit more hopeful today than I have in a long, long time....

I still miss my old boss.  I love him - he is a dear friend and I still talk to him a lot - and I think I will always be in touch with him 'cuz he is a friend.  But I think I've turned a corner....I want to try.  I have to try.

Some may say I'm 'drinking the Kool-Aid' - deciding to like him (our new boss) when others hold on to maybe not liking him so much.  But if you want to work in our district for the next 10 or more years, you kind of have to jump on the damn bus with both feet.  There's no 'sort-of' in this.  It's all or nothing.

I love our district.  This is my home.  I want to work here until I retire - and I have to do whatever needs to be done to make that happen.

Thanks for listening.  And for being patient while I sorted things out in my head.  Change is hard even for those responsible for making it seem easy to all the rest of the folks working their hearts out.  I have been broken hearted about my old boss leaving....but I think I'm getting better about it now.  Little by little.