Friendly Drama

I have no idea where this post will take me on this cold-ish winter morning...and I admit right from the start that the actual purpose of the post is quite possibly avoidance. I don't want to go upstairs and take a shower and put on work clothes and then head in to my office around 6AM-ish. But that's what I will be doing - after letting off some steam via words.

H. got caught in a stupid, stupid lie last night. It is so ridiculous that I will spare you all the 'details'....but that's kind of hard because the devil is in the details. Suffice it to say that his story about something he supposedly did with friends - something as innocuous as seeing a movie - didn't add up. And I am the Chief of Police Regarding Things Not Adding Up around here and I ferreted out the (now) supposed truth. I don't think that story is the truth either - but I may never know the actual truth of what really happened. Though as the COPRTNAU around here, I will do my level best to get it out of him.

He doesn't do 'dishonest' well and I suspect his queasy stomach sometime in the next few days will be the 'tell' and then it will all come spilling out...seemingly out of nowhere after days of that gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach gets the best of you.

If he were any other kid and if I were any other parent and if we hadn't spent a year in hell with him sorting through mountains of crap and putting our family through a ringer that we all barely survived, I might lighten up and move on. But we are not that family - and I am not that mother - and he is not that kid.

I told J. a few weeks ago 'I'm starting to think of H. as the 'easy' kid again - and the last time I felt that way, all hell broke loose'. And so it is.....

I don't think he's doing anything horribly bad. But the truth is I don't know. And there's an easy answer out there somewhere - peeing in a cup, for example - and we may be doing that again. Haven't in awhile. But might be. He resents that - he's an 'adult'. But as I frequently remind him, he's living in our home as an adult and therefore, our rules still trump his righteous indignation at being forced to pee in a cup.

Life's a bitch. And so's your mother. (That would make a great book title).

He will likely call or text me at work today attempting to re-establish communication...and I have a very busy day that isn't jammed full of meetings and a million things to do so I don't think I'll be entertaining conversation about the events of the past couple days - thank you very much - but eventually it will happen.

I have a new favorite album these days - the new Snow Patrol album. I listen to it over and over and over - it's so rare to have an album where you love every single song. And I have another post forming about a particular song on that album and how it's resonating for me and B. regarding his life's direction. I read the liner notes (downloaded from iTunes and I absolutely LOVE how they also included the entire album's lyrics and dedications, etc.). I always miss that when downloading tunes from iTunes but they included it.

And one of their dedications is this simple phrase: Parents be patient with your children.

So true. I'm sure the Snow Patrol guys parents had moments of 'are you kidding me? You intend to make a living making music and being in a band'? But their patience paid off - 'cuz they are doing just that.

So I trudge upstairs saying in my head that phrase: be patient with your children. Though every ounce of my being wants to rip his sweet head off his neck at the moment, I will be patient with my child.

And then I'll be patient with the other one, too.

Parents, be patient with your children. Lather, rinse and repeat. And repeat again. And again. And.....