Dan

Dan Fogelberg died this morning at ~6AM EST. I hadn't heard a thing - if news doesn't make the top three teasers on Yahoo, I won't hear about it. And sadly, I did not know he had died until J. returned from the slopes and said 'I'm sure you heard about Dan Fogelberg'.

It's probably a good thing I did not know because I would have spent the entire day immersed in his music, mourning. To say I am a fan is putting it mildly. I have never missed an opportunity to see him in concert, including going multiple times within months of each other in my college days. I also had the distinct pleasure of front row seats for a solo acoustic show at the intimate Berkeley Community Theater some time back. Amazing show. Close enough to watch all the fret work and strumming. Not too mention see his eyes. Oh, those eyes.

I discovered his music in 8th grade - the coolest history teacher at the school played his music all the time so of course, I had to take his history class. I learned to play most of his songs on the guitar and practiced his technique for hours. His songs are intricate and beautiful and hauntingly, achingly heartfelt. I have listened to his songs through falling in love, falling out of love, grieving the serious illness of loved ones, raising kids, finding myself and my voice.

He died of prostate cancer, which saddens me deeply because if caught early, it is highly curable. Probably too busy touring, too busy writing, he perhaps failed to get checked annually and the disease was advanced by the time it was discovered a few years ago. He retreated to his family and acknowledged on his website he had no intentions of touring or recording anytime soon. His voice has been silent the past few years and those who love him had already begun to feel the pain of missing him.

Tomorrow, I will take some CDs to work and listen. And probably fight tears. His music will always be a part of my soul....and in my heart. It makes me thankful for my voice and my musical gift. It makes me grateful God put people on this earth that can so brilliantly write songs that make you think and make you hurt and love and feel joy all at the same time.

Rest in peace, Dan. Thank you for all the joy you brought to my life. Thank you for saying so many things I could never find words for - until I heard it in a song - your songs. You are loved and will be missed - and your music will live on in many hearts around the world.

I've had this feeling so steady and strong
I'm feeling so holy and humble.
The next thing I know, I'm all worried and weak
I feel myself starting to crumble.
The meanings get lost and the teachings get tossed
And you don't know what you're gonna do next.
The days miss their mark and the nights get so dark.
And some kind of message comes through to you.
Some kind of message comes through...and it says to you:
Love when you can, cry when you have to.
Be who you must, that's a part of the plan.
Await your arrival with simple survival
Someday we'll all understand.
Someday we'll all understand.
Someday we'll all understand.

Part of the Plan
by Dan Fogelberg