Evening Espresso

I am surviving time without the men.  I am working frantically and busily to get stuff done.  I come home each evening and 'putter' around - getting stuff done around here that feels good.  It's a lot to do with just one person - garden, pets, yard, day-to-day stuff.  I sit down long enough to tend my games (and I've given up three of them entirely 'cuz it's becoming a full time job and I already have one of those) and eat - and keep moving.  I'm living on leftovers (so far) and think how much less J. and I will spend on food when it's just the two of us.  I think I'm getting wings tonight from Wing Stop - a treat I only do when no one else is home 'cuz feeding three men wings from Wing Stop requires a huge amount of $.  So it's just me and Garlic Parmesan wings! 

I've been bringing work home and usually work late into the evening.  Last night, I did things sort of backwards....decided to work 'late'.  Around 8:45, I made myself a shot of espresso with a little milk and caramel sauce over ice.  Yummy!  and a great pick-me-up.  Psyching myself up for a late night and giving myself little pep talks....'I can do this.  I pulled all nighters many times in college.  Spend the time now and you'll feel so much better tomorrow'.  Only thing is:  I forgot that they bring the finance system down at 9PM every night - so I was amped up on caffeine and couldn't work!  At least not on the system.  I went to bed around midnight and was still awake at 1AM.  Bummer....now I'm exhausted...but I'll make it.  I have to. 

Chloe is bereft without the familia.  The first night, she sat on her haunches by the back door waiting for J. .  At some point, she seemed to realize that he wasn't coming home - and when I walked by, she gave me a look that said 'well, I guess you'll have to do' and promptly flipped over on her side then rolled on her back, begging for a belly rub.  I obliged.  A few minutes later, she came over to me and 'begged' to be on my lap - something she does with J. every night...so I let her - but she can't lick me.  Absolutely no licking allowed with Mom.  She gave me the same look - 'you'll have to do' - and then stayed with me for a few minutes before realizing that my lap isn't nearly as comfortable as J.'s.  So she curled up on her blanket - after she pulled it down from the chair.  I had washed her linens and forgot to put them back down - so she needed to make her own bed.  Poor puppy. 

 I've been able to come home every day to let her out mid-day and I feel so sad for her.  When she hears me pick up my keys and grab my purse, her ears 'wilt' and she walks slowly to her kennel.  I have been playing with her a lot and I've even taken her for walks most evenings.  Quick - but it's something.

I started a 'routine' at work that has my co-workers cracking up - but what the heck.  I run.  We have a construction office now that's down a ways from my building - so I run to go see them.  I run to/from the bathroom - though I think I'm going to limit running to the bathroom on mornings or weekends when no one is around - lest folks think I'm having some 'issues' that require running to a bathroom.  These runs are short and quick - but I run full tilt - at least I have this week when the weather has been very mild.  I doubt I will run that hard during the heat of the summer - but who knows.  I run enough each day that my legs feel rubbery and I'm sore.  I figure short bursts of effort are better than nothing - and based on my muscles, I think it's doing something!  I wear flats to work everyday - if I wore heels, the running would be out - and when our track is finished (that's one of the construction projects happening), I plan to end each day with a run around the track.  So these short bursts are building me up for longer running when the track is done.  And/or running longer distances in the neighborhood.  While a long run seems impossible, the short bursts are totally do-able.  My only problem is:  I have to remind myself to breath.  I realized I hold my breath - not a good thing when you're exerting yourself...so I have to keep saying 'in/out, in/out' to remind myself.

The 'boys' are having a great time.  Weather has been wet and rainy but they are still managing to enjoy the time of being disconnected.  H. texted me the other day and I had to write him back to say 'no international plan!  Shut off your phone!'.  He did.  :-) 

They are home tomorrow - and I'm glad.  It's quiet....and I'm enjoying the quiet...but I miss them.