Trainee

My friend J. called me at work this afternoon - a rare and wonderful treat to hear her voice at the end of the line....instead of a vendor wanting something...or a co-worker wanting something...or a family member wanting something (meaning my kids...my sweet hubby J. can call me anytime and his calls also made my morning/afternoon/day on a regular basis). It was so great to hear her say 'Hi, it's me'...and I knew exactly who it was....

She was calling to give me the TERRIFICALLY AWESOME news that she got a new job - returning her to the working masses who leave the comfort of their home office and trek to an office with lots of other people. She's been working at home the past few months or so - and while it started off OK, I know she's really missed being with people. She hated working at home - loved being home but not the working at home part. She missed being with people - and I know what she means. I work at home now and then (like last weekend when the kids were absolute PITAs about me trying to work at home instead of ruining their plans by daring to request quiet) and I don't think it would work for me long term, either. I don't think I'm disciplined enough - I'm easily distracted and around home, there are so many other things I'd rather be doing. When I'm at work, in my office, I'm a pretty focused maniac and can plow through record amounts of 'stuff' throughout the day. But at home, my mind-set is just not work-related. And I too, miss people. So I know (sort of) what she means....and I'm so thrilled for her that she's going to be back in the workforce with an office and everything! Kudos to her - in this economy, landing a plum job like the one she landed is fantastic - and no surprise to anyone who knows her. She's a gem...and they are rare and wonderful.

We were chatting about our kids - her daughter just got her driver's license. And since H. recently secured his driver's permit, we compared notes on driving with teens. Which neither of us have actually done - because we are so alike in so many ways...(well, we're alike in many, many ways except for the Mayo/Miracle Whip thing - she loves Miracle Whip and in fact, confessed that until she was an adult, she didn't know Mayo even existed. Her family only had Miracle Whip. All the time. I reassured her after she emailed me her MW confession after my post that I still love her...though it's a bit shocking to realize that I thought I knew her and now know you never really do know ANYONE, do you?). So, back to the story - we haven't actually driven with our teen drivers because we're both such control freaks that we can't dare to ride in the car with them. Because, you know, they don't drive like us. At all. They aren't us.

We are both trying to reassure our teens that it's nothing personal. And we laughed because we KNOW that our kids are well aware of our phobias regarding riding in the car when we're not personally behind the wheel - because we both torture our husbands on a fairly regular basis - constantly grabbing the arm rest, or that 'handle' thing that's over the door - PROOF that car makers know EXACTLY how hard it is for some people to ride in cars with other people when other people are DRIVING.

My hubby J. has never had an accident - ever. But riding with him is pretty hard for me. No reason it should be - except I am apparently a complete and total control freak and can't handle that he doesn't slow down when I would (and he should); or take his foot off the gas when I would (and he should); etc. [I could list dozens of things he does (or doesn't) do that he should (or shouldn't) but I know you know what I mean]. I'm better - the kind of 'better' that is created by riding in the car with someone for 20 1/2 years and learning tricks like looking out the window. Or closing my eyes and 'drifting off' into my own world.

Still, riding with other people driving is very hard for me - and so I declined when H. asked me if he could drive. We went to the pharmacy the other evening to pick up his prescriptions related to the nose/face injury he sustained last weekend - it was literally close enough to walk - he walks there with friends all the time but I was tired and it was getting dark so we drove. He came with me because he wanted ice cream (or so he said) but when we were in the car he said 'oh, I should have driven'. And so I had to break it to him - right there, in the car, just the two of us - I had to confirm something his brother has known a long time - I won't ride in the car with him when he's driving. I tried it with B. a few times and decided that training new driver's is not something I'm cut out for. So I stopped. Better to just torture J. - who is used to it and who is an excellent driver, one not even slightly inclined to listen to anything I say - than to torture a young, impressionable, nervous, new driver - who might try to actually incorporate all my concerns and concentrate so hard on making me NOT nervous that they won't be paying attention to driving. So I don't drive with teens. Period.

My friend J. and I are so much alike....guess that's why we're still in touch after YEARS of not working together anymore. Many other friends from those days have come and gone - but she and I stick like glue. I love that about her ....and about us.

She and I are driving to Santa Rosa together for a concert in a few weeks - and I'm sitting here wondering 'who's going to drive'? We've ridden together before and I drove - and she didn't seem nervous - but I never would have imagined she LOVED a bread spread that I won't let within 10 feet of me or my sandwich. And I'm well aware that I don't actually really know her as well as I thought I did. So for all I know, she has to take a Valium before getting in the car with me....

:-)