Pensive

J. is traveling - he's in Colorado for a big meeting, which includes a presentation he's making. He left this morning and will be home late Tuesday evening. He emailed me to let me know his flight out of Oakland was delayed - no surprise since he'd watched the forecast and knew there were blizzards in Denver.

I am always 'on edge' when he's not home - waiting for something to go wrong. Appliances break, leaks happen - it's always something and it's historically been when he's gone. So I wait. I watch the water stain on the ceiling of the dining room like a hawk - searching for any sign that the repair we had done on Friday didn't fix it. Every appliance is scrutinized - every sound analyzed to see if anything sounds 'abnormal'.

The kids are seemingly on their best behavior - J. has obviously reminded them to help me, and they are taking it to heart. They respond to requests immediately with no guff. They do, for the most part, what they are asked to do and I am grateful. I have a really incredibly hectic week ahead - auditors, negotiations, an overnight conference on Weds. & Thurs. - it will be jam packed and I feel tired just thinking about it. The fridge is stocked with quick things to fix for dinner and plenty of snacks. I have made after school chore lists for the minimum day the boys have tomorrow.

I made dinner and baked two loaves of pumpkin bread. I've done a couple loads of laundry, washed two loads of dishes, tidied up the kitchen and played with the dogs. Tried to nap while the kids were out - H. went to a friends house and B. played golf - but wasn't really tired enough to sleep, I guess. I need to make coffee and set the timer on the pot to be really early, so it will be waiting for me when I get up in the morning.

I am heading upstairs shortly to remind the boys to set their alarms. I plan to be at work before the sun comes up, to get a jump start on tasks before the auditors arrive. It's going to be a long week. But I know it will be OK. It will all get done - eventually.

Miss you, J. Miss you being on your computer just behind me, tapping away and laughing at whatever you're reading or watching. Miss your help with the kids and the dogs and the house. Hurry home. Stay warm.