Dyson

Recent experiences have confirmed this fact: ants - gillions and gillions of ants - if sucked up into a Dyson turbo suction canister, do, in fact, die.
Environmentally friendly? Yes. Fast and easy? No, in some ways, though spraying droves of ants with insecticide and then cleaning up the dead bodies is probably an even more time consuming task then vacuuming every surface where ants are marching.

I am ready to tent the house. Seriously. I am convinced they are nesting in every nook and cranny of our house that's not visible due to drywall. They must be. They are coming in through spaces between walls, cabinets, baseboard - yet there's no sign of them outside. NONE. Nada. Zip.

It is making us crazy. Yesterday, there were THOUSANDS of them making their way through the study, all around the room, across the floor, everywhere. Killed them, with the vacuum. Tonight, I arrived home to H. informing me 'hey, there's a gillion ants all over your computer'. Yep. ON THIS COMPUTER. And the desk, the wall, the floor, the counter top - everywhere. Again, point of entry hard to determine but it appears to be from UNDER the house, under this room specifically, up through a crack in the baseboard and into the dwelling where we are living.

It is freaking me out. I feel buggy. I feel them all over me, though they're not.

Oh, and we also have a leaky shower which has soaked through to the dining room ceiling resulting in water stains above our dining room table. Where we are anticipating a Thanksgiving dinner taking place in 5 weeks. With a ceiling that will likely be torn out. The only 'good' thing about this is: if they end up having to destroy the shower to find the leak, then we're getting one of those 'multi spout', thermostat controlled showers on the Kohler commercial. Which I will basically live in. Oh to dream.