Spore

One of my Christmas presents from Santa was the game "Spore". It's a game that's been getting some 'chat' since last Spring and it was released in October. Christmas was a good 'excuse' to get it.

You start off as a one cell creature and you build from there. Your spore decides to be an herbivore or a carnivore or a combo of both. It grows from a one cell, water-living organism to moving onto land and evolving from there. The 'strategy' is to decide how your creature evolves - adding new body parts and elements for defense, personality, running and grasping abilities, etc.

I'm enjoying the game. My creature is coming along, though I've already realized things that s/he needs fixed. (I don't know yet if it's a he or a she but I think of it as a he so that is the pronoun I will use. Has more to do with his 'looks' than anything else - his coloring is blue and gray). His body shape is a bit 'low' to the ground. His speed is increasing, thanks to evolving to the highest level of feet. But his body is too round, too low...and I haven't figured out how to evolve his spine 'up' instead of just more horizontal length.

Along the journey, the creature meets other creatures - and he can either try the 'social' approach or the 'attack' approach. The social approach involves dancing, and singing, and posing and jumping - you greet and try to engage the other creature - and if you both work hard at 'charming' each other, you end up friends. They won't attack you and you don't attack them. If you're injured, their nest becomes a place you can return to heal.

So I started the entire game just using the 'social' approach. It fits my personality. I mean, I don't like conflict. Who does? Really...wouldn't you prefer to just 'get along' with everyone? Make new friends everywhere you go? No hostility. No anger or angst. And of course, obviously, no blood shed...no fake on screen blood.

As my creature evolved, though - as he got bigger and started to encounter bigger creatures, he had to start using the 'attack' approach. I kept hoping that wasn't true - but after he got killed a zillion times (and thankfully, he has unlimited 'lives' - he returns to his nest to heal and eat and he's fine. If the game didn't have unlimited lives and you had to keep starting over, over and over again, I'd quit. I want results. No time for do-overs all the time) I had to resort to attack. And it worked. I started attacking and gaining attack skills. And as I attacked more and more, his skills grew - and not just his attack skills. After successful attacks - when he renders a different creature's species 'extinct', his brain grows. And as his brain grows, that evolves his skills more - his brainpower increases which increases the other skills you can acquire for him.

It is a complicated game...and while I enjoy it, it's time consuming. And I don't like the 'attack' part. All of his attack skills are improving - but he hasn't evolved enough on the social skills to acquire the highest level of 'social' abilities. So he can't 'make friends' at the moment. He just attacks and attacks. And I tire of the fighting. I told J. that I'm liking the game - it requires strategy and thought and it's challenging. There's still many, many more things to evolve. To form communities. To learn to build and transport. Many things to learn and do....and hopefully, figure out how to get him to stand up tall. And run faster having moved up in the world.

I will always choose the social approach first. Always. I'll engage, I'll converse. I don't break out into song and dance, but I will cajole, charm and worm my way into a friendship. I won't give up.

And I only attack when there's no other option. I don't like to attack. I often wish I could be better at it. I sometimes want to attack - I wish I had it in me. But I won't. Only in the game will the fake blood appear. Just in the game.

I bring up this game because I 'celebrated' my two year anniversary at my job this past Sunday. And it's taken a full two years of trying the 'social' approach - of diligently, persistently being social and cordial and communicative to get to this point - but I'm finally, FINALLY no longer dreading going to work. The work is still work - but the people are becoming fun. We're really having fun...and that has been a long time coming. I look forward to seeing the people I work with - and we have fun all day. We work really hard, but we have fun. That's been a really welcome change.

There are still things that require the stronger, less-preferred 'attack' approach. And it's strange to know that I have that power. I do what I do and folks are expected to follow my instructions. I have that authority. I don't use that 'authority' approach very much - but it's in my arsenal when I need it. And like my creature, I'm getting more comfortable in both roles. I'll meld to whatever I need to - choosing kindness and communication and fun as the first choice, always. But I know what needs to happen and I know what to do to ensure it happens. And that's my evolution. It's been hard to get used to that 'role'. To that job requirement of knowing when 'social' isn't working anymore - isn't working for a particular situation or issue. But I'm there. I am most definitely there. And it feels good...to know that it's far better than it ever has been - and to feel more comfortable choosing either path - they are adaptable, like me - and both work. And, most importantly - the more stern approach only involves those NOT in my department. I only have to resort to the more 'stern' approach in dealing with other employees across other areas that aren't following what we've set up as guidelines/procedures.

Like my creature, I just have to keep working on all the skills, all the time. And keep evolving. I'm never going to feel completely comfortable with either approach all the time - but evolving those skills is also a skill. And I'm working hard on that.