Acknowledgements of Age

J. made tuna salad sandwiches for lunch today.  I started to note 'tuna' on our Costco list - but then didn't.  Added one can to our Walmart cart. 

I feel old.  Acknowledging that we are at the point where we don't need to buy 8 cans of tuna when having two on hand (replacing the one we used with just one can) is plenty.  

I trekked to Target for the first time in months - we found some additional pictures we bought when we were in Hawaii (years and years ago) and we need frames for them so we can hang them in the guest room.  I looked online at Target and didn't see much but I decided to start there first to see what they had before making a second stop at Michael's.  Found the perfect frames at Target for 1/2 what I would have paid at Michael's so that was a 'win'.  Also got a few toiletry items we needed.  And (true confession) two small mini cartons of mini robins eggs.  They were prepping Easter candy and I couldn't resist. 

We've decided to go ahead and upgrade our phones.  I've had my phone since 2012 - it's an iPhone 6s.  J. has an iPhone 8.  We're going for the new iPhone 12 Pro Max.  Woot woot!  We get a decent trade in value for our old phones and will return to having the monthly payment for the phone back in our monthly bill - it's been nice for some months to have no phone cost in the payment - but it's OK.  When discussing what storage size to get, J. said 'I know you're worried about our monthly payment so we can go low'.  And I said 'there is absolutely no issue with how much the payment will be - we can manage whatever it is.  And considering we're getting new phones with amazing new camera technology, I think I'd like to err on getting as much storage as we can - I think we're very likely to enjoy taking a lot more pics using the telephoto lense. 

Working to get the guest room ready because B. is coming for a visit - he arrives on March 5th and is here for a week.  He's hoping to have some California friends drive up this way to spend a day or two with him but we're leaving those plans flexible.  One of the friends' wife has a daycare out of their home and they are moving to a new home and the logistics of that big move (with all the re-inspections that go into running a licensed daycare) are still being worked through.  Hoping they can come up but we'll see.  Can't wait to see B.!  

Things with H. are OK.  Sometimes feels like too OK.  It all seems so easy for him at times....wreak havoc on the lives of your family yet again but just move forward.  I realize (having written it) there's really not much else to do but move forward - but then I had a conversation with him yesterday and was quickly overwhelmed with tracking what he was saying and trying to figure out truth vs. story.  And upon realizing that, I sort of immediately felt 'so I'm not sure I want to continue to have frequent conversations with him about 'his life'.  Maybe it's time to request that he text weekly to confirm he's fine and we do a catch up call every week to ten days or so apart.  Maybe that sounds stupid - to put frequency constraints around talking to a close family member - but truly, my psyche no longer has the energy or desire to attempt to keep up with figuring out the machinations of his day to day life.  

We had a very nice stay at Atlantis - I lost overall but had some good wins on Thursday evening and Friday morning that restored some of what I'd lost.  The regrouping around winning back some always feels so good - even though in the end, I was in the red.  Oh well.  I will be there twice a week for the rest of the month AND we have a two night stay again on the last weekend of the month - J.'s going to do a Black Jack tournament so we decided to use the room that came with the entry into the tournament.  That will be a lot of fun - I love long days of play knowing there's a room available for breaks.

I made bread yesterday - a 'rustic' loaf.  It turned out OK but had lots of issues.  I Googled the issues I experienced and they literally said 'dough was too wet; dough was too dry; dough was under proofed; dough was over proofed; dough was under-kneaded; dough was over-kneaded.  You see the issue?  Really not sure which way to go - but I do think the dough was a bit moist and I didn't knead it very much.  (Recipe said not to over-handle the dough but I think I should have kneaded it a bit).  We ate it with turkey noodle soup that we thawed from Thanksgiving.  Next, we'll use the bread to make maple bread for breakfast one day this week and then we'll turn it into croutons. 

And I'm going to bake it again this coming Sunday - practice makes perfect!