Happy Veterans Day

Veterans Day is the day to honor our military forces for their service.  I've been thinking a lot about this day as it's approached because it does take on new meaning being the mom of a soldier.  B. is uncomfortable when people thank him for his service.  In his mind, not being deployed means he's not really done anything to deserve the thank you?  He's not realizing how selfless and serving enlisting in the military truly is.  He chose this career - he felt called to serve, really.  As his mom, I wrestled with his enlisting quite a bit - but when your child tells you they want to serve, how can you argue with that.  So he is.  And thousands of others are, too.  And we remember all those loved ones we've known who've also served - and fought. It's a very meaningful day for me these days.

I was thinking back to his graduation from Basic - how it felt to see the hundreds of newly minted soldiers taking the field and the huge lump in my throat I had - this tremendous sense of pride that one of those young men was ours....and also just the sheer magnitude of realizing that all those young people volunteered to do this.  They stepped up and into a world they knew would challenge them in ways they'd never imagined - and they still said yes.

I looked back in my blog for recollections of that trip and found this post in draft state - so in honor of Veterans Day, I will share it.  It truly can't convey the pride and joy we felt watching these young people become official soldiers - B. included.

B., people thank soldiers for their service because you are serving - you've chosen to serve.  Of all the other zillions of thing you could do, you have chosen to be in the United States Army and that's no small feat.  You are a great young man and a soldier - and you deserve thanks and acknowledgement for that.  Your reply of 'thank you for your support' is perfect - and all soldiers past, present and future deserve our warm thanks - on this day and every day.

Here's the post from April, 2013.


The Turning Blue and Graduation ceremonies were amazing.  B. was right in front of us at the Turning Blue - we had left some papers and a Dunkin Donuts bag on two chairs in the front row before we went to the family orientation meeting - and miraculously, they were still there when we returned.  He was literally 15 feet from us - though sometimes hidden by his drill Sargent who was standing directly in front of B. .  Oh well.  I teared up when I saw him and he smiled a brief smile and then stared up and straight ahead.  He later told me he had to do that 'cuz it was emotional for him to see us, too.....

After the Turning Blue, we went to the National Infantry Museum and toured and had a nice lunch. There were a lot of families there with new graduates and it was fun to see so many smiling faces. All of us with grads knew what they've endured - at least not first hand but watching from afar - and there were proud faces everywhere.  The museum was amazing - it's hard to describe but it would be impossible to go through it and not have a lump in your throat through most of your walk.  When you think of the magnitude of what soldiers do - and now, that they do it voluntarily - it's pretty incredible.

B. went back to the hotel with us with all his 'gear' and then we had dinner at a small sports bar.  We hung out in the hotel room for a bit and then it was time to take him back to base.  B. found out that immediately after graduation on Friday morning, he had to report to Airborne School for 'processing'.  We pre-agreed not to try to find each other after the ceremony -

The graduation ceremony was incredible....the base band played and entertained us (they were AWESOME) and the speeches were brief and meaningful.  Again, lump in the throat most of the time because you just can't imagine these 400+ young men volunteering to put themselves in harms way - but they are.  The new soldiers marched off the field and headed to the front of the museum to have their group photos taken - and then they were off.  We got to the front of the museum in time to see hundreds of soldiers running towards the buses that awaited them - so we were very glad we had already agreed not to try to meet up.  Wouldn't have wanted B. to be worried that he didn't have time to find us - 'cuz he had to get where he needed to be.

He was 'processed' for the next six hours and we picked him up in time to have a nice dinner.  He arrived with all his gear - much of it soaking wet 'cuz it rained off and on that day and while they were being processed, the gear sat outside in the rain!  After dinner, we headed back to the hotel to do some laundry and help B. get his gear tidied up and readied.  Though he wanted us to take some stuff home, we decided it would be better to keep everything issued so far - even though he's pretty sure he won't need it....we did take some papers and his boot camp year book home with us.


The post is a bit choppy - I actually sort of told parts of the story in a few other posts - but the Turning Blue ceremony on the field at Ft. Benning is what I will never forget about my soldier. Having survived the hardest 13 weeks of his life up to that point - including absolutely no phone or social media direct contact with anyone in his circle of friends and family - was reason to celebrate. The field, completely full of new soldiers was such a proud moment for me as a mom - but really, more as an American.  I didn't expect to feel so overwhelmed by the events that weekend, but it was truly an awe-inspiring weekend.  

B., I'm so, so proud of you and your service.  You are an amazing young man and I am so honored to be your mom.

Post-Beethoven

You know it was an amazing concert when you can't stop humming.  The 2nd movement of Beethoven's 7th is one of my most treasured and beloved pieces of music and it's playing in my head over and over this morning.  Lovely evening - and considering I wasn't feeling stellar most of yesterday and wasn't sure about getting there last night, I'm so glad I/we made it - it was beautiful.

I'm heading out this morning for some errands that I didn't get to yesterday and then back upstairs to continue working in tidying up my bedroom.  I've got a box of books for the library filling up and soon, bags of clothing will be added to the donation pile.  Hoping to create a better 'sanctuary' vs. 'the place you sleep that's also where you stash stuff you don't know what to do with'.

And I might need to retract the EBay post about the french horn...it makes me nervous to list it and then be on pins and needles hoping nothing goes wrong.  Like someone 'wins' and somehow manages to not pay - I think J. is going to take it to a music store in Modesto that accepts consignments and we'll see what happens.  Bidding on EBay may increase the price vs. consigning it - but it's a lot less nerve wracking to just have it sell in a store and they send us a check (net their commission).

The free fish that we've purchased a small tank for also got a new heater yesterday - he's not doing all that well and I keep trying to gently remind H. that fish are fraught with all kinds of things that can go wrong - and there's no way to take them to the vet so....we watch and wait.  We were hoping the heater would help but poor Bowzer is still lurking on the bottom of the tank, not moving much and not eating.  Not good signs.

I dread getting in the shower - wait, that's not true - I'm fine with getting IN the shower, I just dread getting OUT of the shower 'cuz it's freezing cold.

Long week ahead, which I also dread.  Sundays have become mostly about dreading Mondays (even more) and all that comes after Monday, too.  Here's to better days ahead, at some point.

First Timer

I'm marching out boldly - after decades of tiptoeing lightly - into the world of trying to sell something on EBay.  It's time for my french horn to find a new home and hopefully, there will be a little cash to us in exchange.  I've considered (carefully) donating it to the district I work for - but there are multiple schools with music programs and it's hard to go random on the selection of who gets it. You'd think I would lean towards the school my kids attended - but I lean way far from that school these days so....I just can't decide and I'm not willing to draw straws.  I'm setting a minimum and a reserve but it's reasonably priced - though I hope it will be bid on aggressively and sell for much more than my minimum.  I just can't bring myself to risk it and list it as a straight auction 'cuz if I had to let it go for very little, it would break my heart.  It's approaching 39 years new - I got it around Christmas time my Junior year of high school.... 1976!

It's cold here.  I'm dressed in a short sleeve shirt and jeans and wishing I'd remembered to bring a sweatshirt or something downstairs this morning, 'cuz even with the heat on, it feels cold.

As I've been expecting all week, I'm dealing with a side effect of the antibiotics that has me desiring to stick close to home.  Plenty of errands I need to run but I'm not venturing out of the house..yet. Concert tonight will be challenging but I hope I'll be OK.  Made Cracker Crumb buttered pasta for lunch - comfort food.  Hoping the pasta helps slow things down a bit.

J. is car shopping online and says 'I'm going to not get the parking assist feature'.  Um, OK.  But he is looking at the 'lane change' and rear view camera, etc. .  We've managed our entire lives without all these razzmatazz features but now, they're embedded into the other package features he does want, so...you end up getting things you really wish you didn't have to get (and pay for).  I don't begrudge him getting what he wants - something nice - but maybe my stomach is all knotted up and clenchy today trying to figure out how we will pay for it.

We will.  We will be fine.  :-)   We just won't be taking as many trips for a bit - we've had a trip to Paris, a trip to Rome (J. and H.), a trip to Cancun, a trip to Phoenix and Disneyland in April - so that's a lot of expense in one year that we most definitely won't be doing when there's a car payment in the monthly budget again.

I warned J. that my next car will likely be the Toyota Highlander hybrid - Escape Hybrid is no longer made - and that's going to be pricey.  But five to seven years from now - who knows what will be out there!  Maybe it will be a hover-car of some kind.

H. wants a hover-board for Christmas.  And Playstation 4.  Nothing inexpensive on his list at all.

We will depart for Modesto in a few hours so I think I'll try to take a quick nap.

A New Car on the Horizon Anyway

We got B. through his new-car-itis and feel reasonably sure he is realizing that buying a very expensive truck and committing himself to long term debt is probably not the best decision.  Dodoged the 'new car bullet' on that one - at least we thought we had.

H. was in a car accident on Wednesday - he rear ended the guy in front of him and the guy in back of H. hit him.  As the three cars were moving over to get out of the main road, the guy who hit H. hit the gas and took off - H. is at fault so....he was a little sore (and pissed off that his air bag didn't deploy) but he's fine physically.  And that's what's most important.

We are reasonably sure the car will be considered totaled - the repairs are $5500 and it's not worth that - so....

Our current plan is to let H. drive J.'s current car (a Hybrid Toyota Camry) and J. will be getting a new car.  We're trying to postpone until after the holidays 'cuz we'd like to make a savings withdrawal to make a large down payment - but we'll see what kind of 'great deals' come up during the next couple months.  I know our monthly budget can handle a car payment 'cuz it's only been a little over a year since we paid off my car - but I'd really like to avoid a $700 a month payment if at all possible. Under $400 is my goal.

It sort of makes me consider leasing (which we've never, ever done) but I really don't like renting a car....even though J.'s mileage is fairly low, I just don't want to pay every month for the 'use' of a car. I much prefer investing in a car and when the monthly payments are done, we have something that's an asset -

J. loves shopping for cars so he's a happy camper and will be well occupied in upcoming months.  He does want a hybrid and there are a lot more options out there now than when he purchased his Camry (9.5 years ago), so he's happily looking over car after car -

Since H. pitched in for his car, the check we will get from the insurance company will beef up his savings.  And depending on his final report card this semester, we plan to greatly assist him with expenses for his next semester.  He's really done an amazing job - keeping up with assignments; attending classes regularly and forming friendships with others in the class to help with studying; reading and studying often.  It's a joy to see him 'getting' that if you put the effort into the process of learning, it really makes a huge difference.  He loves his math teacher and he's really working hard at mastering the things he needs to 'get'.  Finally!

Tonight, we head to Modesto for Beethoven's 7th at Gallo Center for the Arts.  Looking forward to an evening out - we may eat here in town or just eat at home.  Probably home 'cuz we are going to a show next Friday evening with friends (Kathleen Madigan also at Gallo) and we plan to enjoy dinner out with them before the show.

Work is work lately - there's so much going on that I can't write about and some days, I feel so 'done' with things....I love my boss, love my job - but the same 'stuff' from the same people day after day gets to me.  When people you think you know and trust start doing things that are just so completely wrong - and there's really not much you can do except think 'what a train wreck of a person' - it's hard.

We are working in the yard this weekend - we have a bunch of plants that arrived before we left for Cancun - they are doing well keeping moist in a bin of water but it's time to get them in the ground and then cross our fingers we don't experience a huge freeze before they get settled in the beds.

I'm still dealing with my sinus issues.  I'm religiously taking my antibiotics and am less congested than I was but the nights are back to being a challenge - trying not to cough through the night.  I see a repeat visit to the doctor in the future.

Fortuitous Absence

At 5AM yesterday, I woke myself up enough to get the iPad off my nightstand and go to our district website....then the HR department link...and then the link to our Substitute/Time Off system - and officially 'called in sick'.  Normally, I would have also phoned my boss and left a message on his office phone - but for the first time ever, I just used the system everyone uses and skipped the phone call.  If it's good enough for other staff, it's good enough for me.  I got an email from my boss at 8:02 acknowledging he saw the absence with two words 'feel better'.

Knowing the housecleaning crew was coming for the first time in four weeks (we cancelled during our trip to Playa 'cuz the logistics of getting H. to get things tidied up for them combined with the risk of having no idea what the house would look like when they arrived and not wanting to put them through that) would be enough reason for me to not want to hang out at the house on a day I feel punky - I don't really do well when other people are doing things I should be doing.  But I stayed home anyway. J. said he thought they'd be here 11ish....but 11 came and went and so did noon.  I wanted so badly to crawl into bed and sleep - but their 1PM arrival made that not doable.  So I piddled around trying to help J. get things ready for them - all the suitcases are officially unpacked; the 'Vamos a la Playa' box in the garage is restocked for the next trip - .

J. fields a lot of things with the 'boys' and I leave him to it.  Our family dynamic is one of avoiding talking to mom about 90% of things at all costs and it's worked for us.  They are 'men' and they know that my reaction might be significantly different compared to their dad's....maybe I shouldn't admit that in these missives but whatever.  I'm the mom.  I point out the illogicality of much of their stuff and they don't like that - so they go to their dad.  He's a good listener, smart, also a guy....

B. had somehow convinced himself that - because his truck needs 'another' $500 in repairs (rear brakes this time) - that it's time to buy a new truck.  He apparently had found one at a dealership...and been told they could get him into it for $150 per paycheck.  'Around 2-3% interest'.  He actually had no idea about the specific terms of the loan - interest rate, length of the loan, out the door price of the vehicle being considered.  I inserted myself into the equation pronto by requesting J. switch the call to speaker phone mode (iPhone)....and tried to gently, though firmly, but with as little bat-shit-crazy-banshee as I could point out how ridiculous it is for him to want to avoid a $500 expense by buying a $35K vehicle.

I then also proceeded to use Edmunds and Kelly Blue Book with J. - and we couldn't find any inventory within 250 miles of El Paso close to what B. was being told (over the phone only, I think) about the truck.

J. wrote a list of things for B. to consider and emailed it to him - and B. wrote back (finally) and said 'you're right, I'm stupid'.  So I hope that means he's not planning to buy a truck.  I added a FB message (not revealing that I knew he had just messaged his dad an indication he was realizing how ridiculous it was) that confirmed that if he locked himself in to $300 a month for a car payment, plus increased insurance (which he hadn't scoped out yet) combined with savings monthly for maintenance (because yes, even new cars require maintenance and if you'd been saving monthly for maintenance of your current vehicle like you were going to when you bought it a couple years ago (with us loaning him the $ for a ridiculously low interest rate and payment), you would have the $500 you need for brakes that you can't afford now thus deciding going into debt $35K is 'better'), your budget would be so tight, you would have no $ to travel home; no $ for tattoos and golf (his latest obsession); no $ for time with friends going out and enjoying food and beverages; or a movie; or anything 'extra'.  For a to-be-determined number of months - though J. and I surmised the terms of the loan must be at least an 8-10 year obligation to make the $300 a month work.

And somewhere in all that, B. also confirmed with J. that it's looking not likely on coming home at Christmas - but he hasn't told me that yet.

We quickly offered to come up with the $ for the brake job (driving an unsafe truck is unwise) but he refused to accept the loan.  Leaving me with nail biting nightmares about an accident....but J. drove the truck when he was there and said that with the front breaks fixed, it's likely far better and it should be fine until B. can make repairs.

If I hadn't called in sick, I would have missed all the 'fun' and B. might own a new truck by now - so it was worth the 8 hours charged against my sick time.  :-)

It's now 6:30ish and I need to hop in the shower to get going for a very busy day....

It's Raining, It's Pouring

And lightening and thundering, too!  I awoke in the middle of the night (Awoke!  as in I was actually sleeping!!  Yeah!) hearing strange noises.  Unfamiliar sounds.  I decided to get up and go to the bathroom and realized when my feet hit the carpet that it was coming from outside....and then a couple steps towards the bathroom, it hit me - it was raining!  I did a little happy dance between my bed and the bathroom and then snuggled back in bed and went right back to sleep.  Nothing like a rainy night to promote sound sleep.

The Benadryl I took also probably had something to do with it - but that's OK.  I plan to repeat again tonight in hopes of another good night's sleep.  I also added my inhaler to the mix which took away the tickle that makes me cough with every breath.

I made it until 1PM today which was pretty good considering at 8:30 this morning, I was pretty sure I wouldn't make it until 9...but I had things I had to do so I just kept doing them -

I'm still coughing a little but things are improving...but it's only 6:19PM, pitch black outside and I'm so ready for bed....so I think I'm heading upstairs pretty soon -

This week has daily meetings across the entire week along with board prep and starting on my report due to the Board in December.  It's going to be busy so I sure hope I start to feel better soon -

I read back this time last year and it also rained a fair amount in November - which gave us all hope for a good snow year...and that didn't happen.  Sure hope this year will be continuous snow and rain - one major year of snow won't really get us out of the drought but it might help.  I'm looking into ways to store the shower water we have everyday 'cuz Mother Nature is watering our plants at the moment. I know J. thinks I'm crazy - but if we could use a huge bin with a lid or a barrel of some kind, we could store water to have when the rain stops - whether that's in a week or six months.  I just hate to waste the water now that I see how much we have been wasting.

So many little changes we've made that I realize we could have and should have made 'standard practice' for our entire lives - it's amazing the amount of water wasted that we've never thought about.

It's time to head to bed....hoping for another decent night's sleep.

So True

The only difference is:  we just take all the Reese's out of the candy bags and don't give them out.

It was pretty quiet last night - things seemed to start much later (probably because it wasn't a school night) and wrapped up pretty quickly -

There's plenty of leftover candy to take to work - so it will be a busy but chocolate filled week.

I had another rough night but am going to get cleaned up and head out to Petsmart - I came downstairs and noticed Bowzer's bowl had a crack - with two ends approaching the meeting point (moving in a circular direction) - which would have been a disaster if I hadn't noticed.  We moved him into his temporary apartment (a clear Tupperware bowl) to give me time to get to the store.  He will be enjoying a significant upgrade to his digs today.

Always enjoy this Sunday with the extra hour - usually, I feel like we get so much more accomplished in the extra time - but today will be low key and I won't be doing much.  Just trying to stay vertical and not break a rib coughing my guts out.  :-)