Should Have...

taken the entire week off.  Monday mornings suck - especially after four days of sleeping in.  The thought of repeating this torture next Tuesday (after FIVE days off) is almost more than I can handle.  I thought of calling my boss and leaving a message - but calling in 'absent' for the entire week when I've been expected for a few days, at least, is probably not the best career move.

But oh how I wish I would...could....

It's 6:30AM and I'm just heading to the shower.  Reset the alarm a few times this morning.  Sometimes, those extra 30 minutes (times a couple) are the best sleep I get all night!

I remind myself that B.'s return to reality this morning was likely a hundred times worse.  I don't have a drill Sargent yelling at me to wake me up! 

So there's that.....at least. 

RASP!

Yesterday, J. was awakened by B. calling - forgetting that it's 3 hours earlier here?  He told J. some good news and bad news.  Upon my awakening (a couple hours later), I got to talk to B. - no timer!  The bad news: he's not going to get a week off after Basic Training so no trip home.  The good news?  He was offered and signed a RASP (Ranger Assessment & Selection Program) contract last week!  He is so excited - and deservedly so!  The kid has worked his heart out to reach that goal - and what a great thing to accomplish.  I've been afraid to think about it too much - fearing I would jinx it and/or preparing for the disappointment.  I thought he had a PT (Physical Test) still to come - but it turned out they called him into the 'office' and offered him either Special Forces or RASP - he took RASP.  It's an honor to be offered either - both is a dream.  B. chose RASP because it's more of an 'action' position.  But Special Forces is still an option...

He will finish Basic in a few weeks; then head to Airborne training for two weeks then to RASP.  He finishes RASP at the end of June - and who knows where from there.  If he's selected as a Ranger, he would be based at one of three bases - two in Georgia and one in Washington (the state - not DC).  He hopes for Washington 'cuz at least it's on the same coast as home.  If he doesn't make RASP - then we'll see.  That's the part that scares me - but I am working hard at not worrying about all the 'what-if's'.  I'm just going to enjoy the moment - continue to be incredibly proud of him - and pray about it all as often as I can.  It will work out....

He sounds very good and thoroughly enjoyed his 32 hour pass.  He had dinner at TGI Fridays last night with a bunch of his friends.  They stayed in town, enjoying comfortable beds and hot showers and eating with no time limits!

His pass ends in a couple hours.  He called again this morning - another nice long-ish call.  And we've been Facebook IM'ing off and on all weekend.  It's been so great to hear from him - he sounds so great and so happy. 

We also got a really long letter from him - and after describing one of the activities they engaged in the past couple weeks, he commented that he still frequently thinks 'I can't believe I just got paid to do that!'.  Good sign when you love what you're doing and getting paid is a bonus!

I am cooking quite possibly the smallest corned beef ever - and J. keeps gently reminding me that it's just the two of us and it will be plenty!  I know he's right - but it's so odd to cook such small portions of things.

I've been enjoying my long weekend - and looking forward to another long weekend next weekend when we celebrate our 23rd!  It's Sunday and I'm sort of wishing I had just taken the entire week off - but oh well.  Three days will fly by and I do have plenty to do. 

We are waiting for the arrival of son #2 who will be working for four hours today to earn the $ we advanced him mid-week so he could go out to dinner and a movie with his 'friend'.  H.'s budgeting skills continue to be lacking...but we're getting by.  He won't be thrilled about working for us today but oh well.  I'm not exactly thrilled about spending my Sunday supervising, either - but that's life.  Yard work!

We've got 70's and 80's music blaring in the family room - doors and windows open to let in fresh air.  It's Spring-like!  J. and I've celebrated the weekend by eating out a lot and shopping a little.  J. has needed new clothes for a really long time - and I'm taking advantage of a tidier closet that makes knowing what I need to 'add' so much easier.  My goal is to get to a solid set of work outfits that I feel really good in - and then giving away the rest.  It's time... I bought a pretty skirt and top to wear to B.'s graduation in April - and if it looks nice, I might just shock the heck out of everyone at work and wear a skirt to work!  That would be a surprise.

Chloe got her shots on Friday and she's a little 'off' this weekend.  Not her usual bouncing off the walls self.  It's like when your kid is sick - you just feel so bad for them and would do anything to get them back to normal.  I'm sure she will feel better in a couple days. The vet complimented J. on how great she looks - she's got a nice hourglass shape (thanks to more walks and fewer treats!) and she's looking really svelte! 

Congratulations to B. on an amazing accomplishment.  When he sets his mind to something, he is unstoppable!

Spring-Like-Break

I am off today and tomorrow!  Yippee!  J. just returned with a breakfast burrito (to share) from the Taqueria and a trenta black iced tea to jump start the day.  Many, many things we want to accomplish around here and while I took days off 'cuz my psyche needs them, I do not want to look back on this time and think I wasted it.

I came home Monday evening to take advantage of the daylight that results from the time change - after the longest day on the planet 'cuz it was a struggle to get up that morning - and J. and I turned the soil in the raised veggie beds.  As I shoveled, I noticed some curled up caterpillar like creatures - and we started pulling them out of the beds.  We think we took out over 100 that first night - and thanks to the power of the Internet, we were able to identify the creatures as Japanese Beetle larvae!  Yuck!  Had we left them in the bed, they would shortly awaken to feed on the plant roots - so glad we didn't just plant this year - but instead took the time and effort to work the soil - 'cuz if we had just planted, we would have essentially provided just the smorgasbord they would need to come out of their winter sleep, eat away all the roots and then surface as full grown beetles which devastate any plants they can!  They are voracious eaters and can strip trees, shrubs and flowers bare in a matter of days!

We are still turning the earth over and over and still pulling out beetle larvae like crazy....and I was so 'in the mood' to garden that I decided to split what was to be a full week off into two long weekends...thus making today and tomorrow officially non-work days.

There is so much happening at work that my head (and heart) are spinning and slipping and sliding all over the place lately - and I think my boss understood that I just needed to step off the slippery treadmill for a couple days.  I know it won't help as much as I wish it would 'cuz Monday will be here in the blink of an eye.  But then I'm off next Thursday, Friday AND the following Monday to celebrate 23 years with my husband!  No plans - just time together piddling around the homestead.

I am looking forward to long conversations with B. who will be on a 36 hour 'pass' this weekend!  Talking to him with no time limit AND possibly texting back and forth a bit is something I can't wait to do.  I miss that young man!

Time to get showered and dressed in my garden clothes and ready for a day of yard work!  The lawn needs fertilizing, patching, etc. and there are plenty of things to trim and pull and plant!  Son #2 has been hired for Sunday (prepaid 'cuz he needed money for a date - his envelope system is working well and he knew that he really didn't have budget for a date - so he asked for an advance on Sunday work and we happily obliged.  Now we just have to see if he really shows up at the appointed time 'cuz being late for 'work' is never a good thing) and so it's going to require some thought of what things to leave for him vs. doing them today.

Spring is here - blue jays are nesting in the trees as they do every year - and we hear them 'scolding' anytime the stray cat that hangs around our yard appears.  He is a 'Scottish Fold' - can't believe he's out and about and seemingly abandoned - and he walks along the fence really slowly which freaks out the jays something fierce!

Boys!

Home alone always sounds better than it ends up being....not that it's not fun to have the run of the house.  It's just that alone is...well, lonely....a bit, anyway.

Around 3PM I decided to head upstairs to read and rest a bit...didn't really take a nap but sort of rested.  Took the phone with me just in case - I always hope for a call from B. .

There was a letter today!  I think the mail is slow 'cuz of the weather back east - it was postmarked March 4th but we just received it today.  He told us that a week ago Wednesday or Thursday (so the end of February), the Drill Sergeant called off 10 RN's (Roster Numbers) and asked if those 10 were interested in Ranger Assessment & Selection Program!  B. was one of them and was thrilled!  He's been improving his PT (Physical Test) every week and is very close to the score needed.  The letter sounded like it was pretty much a 'done deal'....I was so excited!  He has worked so, so hard for this - and getting a RASP contract out of Basic was his dream.  The original dream was to go into Basic with a RASP contract - but for so many reasons, that didn't happen for B..  He's never given up on that goal and has obviously worked diligently towards that goal.  He's doing so great!  So happy.

And then, at 4:30 - after I came back downstairs - the phone rang and it was B.!  OMG - I was so excited.  He immediately asked if I could put Dad on the speaker phone and I had to remind him that Dad was in Visalia this weekend.  He had 10 minutes - which is the longest call we've had so far.  He sounded good - though at first, I wasn't sure.  He's still really congested - he says he feels fine but when I said 'you still sound really stuffy', he said 'I don't really know how I sound anymore'.  Moist Georgia air, I think.

It was great to talk to him - and he will have a 36 hour pass next weekend - all day Saturday and part of Sunday.  He thinks they will have access to their cell phones so he can call and talk as long as we want.  I asked him how this week's PT test went - and he moved up 7 points - still has 5 to go.  His last PT is the Tuesday after his 36 hour break (3/19).  He said it's about a 50/50 chance - I said 'so if you hit the score, it's not guaranteed?'.  It's not - it will depend on how many openings they have for this group.

If he gets RASP, he won't come home after graduation - he will head straight to Airborne there at Ft. Benning.  If he doesn't get RASP, he will get seven to ten days off between Basic and going into the infantry battalion he's been assigned to.  He says if RASP doesn't happen out of basic, he will sign up when he's in the battalion and he feels confident he will still get in.

It's so hard to wait....I can't imagine how hard it is for him - but he said 'I'm going great and I'm happy' - so that's an awesome attitude.  He has worked really hard....

I called J. as soon as I hung up from B. - felt so bad that he missed the call.  Then H. arrived - he had apparently come over when I was upstairs...I thought I heard a door but I always hear things when J. isn't around and I've learned to ignore them....but it was him.  So he came back when I was up...and we went over his budget.  He is doing OK but still struggles with monitoring how much he's spending.

We went over the budget we've put together for him - and this week, I resorted to the budgeting method I used when I was his age - in college, living with my brother and not working.  I made H. envelopes:  Gas, Discretionary and Groceries.  I put his weekly budgeted amount for each in cash in the envelopes.  I told him 'you shouldn't even use your debit card - you have no $ in your checking account and now, all the money you need for the week is in these envelopes.  When the money is gone, it's gone.  If you blow your entire discretionary budget in two days on the weekend, that's it.  You have nothing left for the week...so don't do that!'.  I hope this works.  I offered to get cash for him every week when I get our weekly cash - maybe going to cash basis is best for him for now.  He will get paid next Friday.

I've talked to J. a couple times today - just quick touch base calls.  He played golf with his brother this morning.  He should be home by early afternoon tomorrow -

Time for working on taxes; finishing up laundry; and other stuff before bed.

Creaking

I hear J. up - it's 5:30AM!  The floorboards creak overhead - and it's not a kid!  This is the earliest he's been up in a long time.  He's heading to Visalia today for his 45th high school reunion.  Today is golf, then cocktails tonight.  Tomorrow he'll visit with his brother and our nieces and then the 'big' reunion event is tomorrow night.  Home sometime Sunday.  I will miss him -

I went to his 25th with him and knew no one.  It was OK.  I actually 'know' some of his classmates now - they are Facebook friends that I 'talk' to and play games with.  Try as we did, we couldn't get them to go to the reunion.  If they would have, I would, too....but oh well. 

I am looking forward to a weekend of solitude - which means that this evening, here all alone, I'll be missing him like crazy.  And all the things that go bump in the night will probably worry me.  Still, it will be nice and I am always crazily motivated when he's away. 

The man cleaned out my closet yesterday - and built new shoe shelves so I can really 'see' where things are.  He's organized it in a way that will greatly assist me in culling stuff out - it was just too much of a mess for me to ever want to dive in and clean stuff out - but now, everything is neat and tidy - making identification of things I haven't worn in ages easy-peasy!  So I plan to use the time to really plow through years and years of things I don't use or wear and get them out of here!

He was a little worried that his reorganization would stress me out - but holy cow!  What's not to love about a guy that dives into a messy closet, organizes, categorizes AND builds additional shelves in one day? 

I am the luckiest girl on the planet!

Off to the trenches soon - Happy Friday!

Vamos!

Vamos a la playa!

I made the label above for the box of stuff we are gathering for our trip - to signify we are in full-blown preparation mode for our trip to Playa del Carmen in July.  There are things that 'gather' during the year - like new flip flops and travel sizes of lotions, bath gels, etc. that I save for our beach trips - and it's time to get them all in one place and ready to go.  Over the next couple months, we will continue to hunt and gather what we need for the trip - and lists are started.  I don't want to forget Benadryl cream because I know I will be eaten alive by mosquitoes and that cream is the only thing that works and it's completely not available in Mexico.  Believe me, I've begged - it's not there.  Cortisone?  Yes.  But not Benadryl.  Remember when I was so desperate I bought the liquid Benadryl and smeared it on my legs?  This year, I am not forgetting 'the good stuff'.  

I am proud I was able to recall how to say 'We are going to the beach!' in Spanish!  

Getting excited for 11 days and nights with J. - just the two of us!  It's like a second honeymoon!

Early Friday

I struggled to get the keys out of my purse this morning to unlock the office door.  Had to put down multiple things:  purse, iced tea, notebook, papers from the meeting I attended yesterday that were still in my car since I came straight home.  After all the fiddling around, I put the key in the lock and realize the door is already unlocked.  I hadn't noticed a co-worker's car - 'cuz she was driving her daughter's car.  She greeted me warmly and said excitedly 'I brought you something'.  In her hand, a Starbucks latte!  Just what I needed to get the remaining cobwebs out of my brain.

We chatted hurriedly about stuff - she is off most of next week for a medical procedure that will have her out for a few days - and we're working through the 'new' budget process (necessitated by our new finance system).  Great way to start the day - but since I went in early to prep for a big meeting, I felt a little on edge.  Thing that needed doing weren't getting done - but oh well.  You have to let these moments happen and being a manager means time is never (rarely) my own and my agenda at any given moment is subject to change.  Go with the flow.  Enjoy the moment.  Think back to where we were six years ago and marvel how far we've come and savor it.  It pays to be consistently and persistently nice - 'cuz most folks come around eventually.

Of course it also helps to have leadership at the helm that sets fairly firm expectations of professionalism and courtesy - so the shit that used to happen doesn't happen anymore - or if it does, there are consequences.  Our building is a nice place these days and I'm happy about that.

The morning moved quickly and the big meeting went swimmingly well.  Major task lists still in play but you have to feel good when your boss says 'thank you for all you've done on the massive pile of stuff I've dumped on you lately'.  Yes, you have....but that's OK.  That's what he's supposed to do and I'm doing what I'm supposed to do by getting it all done.  :-)

Shortly after the meeting, I emailed to let him know that I was planning to leave around 2PM today - AND I DID!  The only bad part of that is the overwhelming urge to take a nap - which I am fighting because it will inevitably lead to me feeling terrible upon awakening and then I won't sleep soundly tonight.

A wonderful weekend looms ahead with much to do around the homestead.  The weather appears to be holding at 'beautiful' and the yard is beckoning for some Spring clean up.  I'm also anxious to get veggies in the ground but it's still early in March and I think I'm going to wait just a bit longer.  We will likely get more rain - we typically do.

J. is taking B.'s car (in one of B.'s recent letters, he confirmed her name is Monica) to get a non-operating fan checked out.  We have a buyer! and with luck, the car will be off our insurance entirely and out of our driveway!  A win-win.  B. knows we are working on selling it - he is already thinking about buying a used Jeep when he's officially stationed somewhere and has privileges to leave the base.

Tonight, a great night's sleep and sleeping in tomorrow - then getting busy.  First on the list of tasks is to get the damn taxes done so I can get that off my shoulders.  Three sets this year - us and each 'kid'. It's always a task and a half...but it must be done.

Happy Friday!  We are having fish 'n chips for dinner!