Fed Ex

Arrived home this afternoon to find a Fed Ex delivery envelope addressed to B. I was pretty sure I knew what it was before he opened it - it was information from the Marine Corps. I told him as he opened the envelope 'just so you know, you've been getting letters from every branch of the armed forces of this country and I've been tossing them in the recycle bin. I didn't toss this one because I wasn't positive that's what it was and because it was delivered via overnight delivery. But, I am tossing any and all solicitations you receive related to joining the military'.

He replied 'I'm just exploring all my options, Mom. They can help pay for college.' I said 'WE'LL pay for college. We'll figure it out. You are not going to enlist in the armed forces when we are in a war that we never should have started with no end in sight. It's just not going to happen'. He handed me the packet and asked me to keep it for him. Which I will. Sort of. I'll stash it away somewhere and have conveniently forgotten where when/if he ever inquires about it again. While I add 'pray that B. doesn't join the military' to my list of nightly prayers.

It has turned from lovely, sunny, mild days to freakishly hot in just a day or two. J. put the pool cover on last weekend and in the past 6 days, the pool has heated up from 70 degrees to 84 degrees. Now THAT is my kind of pool water temp. I hope to head outside in the morning and do a bunch of yard work, get all hot and sweaty and then JUMP IN. Sounds great.

Most definitely working this weekend. Tons, TONS to do and my week next week is includes a day out of the office for a class and an attempt to take next Friday off for a 4 day weekend. We'll see. It's a long shot but I'm going to try.

We have all been sick all week. B. and I were home sick on Monday. H. and J. were home sick on Tuesday. B. was home sick Weds. & Thurs. and I forced him to go to the doctor yesterday. Double ear infection and possible mono. It's doubtful, but when I described to Dr. V (who I just LOVE, by the way - absolutely ADORE him - he's just got the nicest personality) how B. has been coming home for weeks and taking a two to three hour nap every afternoon, he said 'hmmm, do you mind if we test him for mono as a precaution?'. I said 'no problem, please do'. I doubt it will be positive but think it's worth considering. He gave us antibiotics to help the ears. B. went to school today but still doesn't feel great. None of us do, really. J. sounds like Barry White - which sounds lovely for about an hour and beyond that, just makes you feel like you're living with a stranger. He blew his nose today and I've NEVER heard him blow his nose so 'noisily', ever. In twenty years. So whatever this 'bug' is, it's nasty and it's working it's way through my entire universe. Hopefully, we're all on the mend now. I feel 'better' though not great - headachy for days, achy, sore throat, etc.

On a fun note, Last Day of Work came out with Virtual VIllagers 3 this week so that has taken up some time attempting to get my new village to survive. So far, I'm up to 12 villagers. Food is running low at the moment and I don't have enough tech points to get to the next 'level' in food production. So may be starting over sometime this weekend. Hope not.

J. is watching 'talking heads' on TV and they are about to REPEAT a diatribe I had to listen to last night. I drew the line. He is now fast forwarding past it. Thank goodness for our PVR on Dish Network. I couldn't handle re-listening and re-watching the spectacle we endured last night.

Signing off for now to go 'lose' the Marine Corp info.

Lovely

It was a lovely day today. Church was great. I just love how our pastor always ties scripture to real life. We read Corinthians - 'love always protects' - and he related that to motherhood. To parents, protecting their kids. To spouses protecting each other. It was a great sermon. And a great time. The music was FANTASTIC - and I'm undoubtedly bias since 2 of my 3 men were in the music group. B. did a terrific job - he's just so great. And J. had a great bass solo. H. did a terrific job on the A/V which was pretty 'involved' - a video, multiple songs, special mom's day slides. Busy.

IHOP was packed - no surprise there. But we only had to wait about 15 minutes and had a terrific meal. It was delicious. We went to Costco and J. got his dad's day present - a touch iPod. He's debating. I guess we had a miscommunication - kind of - I know I mentioned him getting the Touch - but he was debating between the middle and the higher (in terms of memory) 'regular' iPod when last I recall us talking about it. So when the $500 iPod Touch ended up in our cart, I was a bit stunned. I don't begrudge him anything - he deserves whatever he wants. And I want him to have what he will use - he has a terribly long commute (45-60 minutes by car and then another 45-50 minutes by BART) and he should have what he enjoys to make that time go by as quickly as possible. So he'll debate it and he'll read this post and feel compelled to take it back - and I don't want him to. I want him to have what he wants.

We have signed the kids up for a two week trip to Europe next year (summer of 2009) - together. The cost of this trip is not something we take lightly - and we will be having to 'cut' a lot from our monthly budget to put toward the trip. I want that trip for the kids - I want it to be B.'s senior trip and I think it's terrific that the two of them will go together. It's not something we just 'dip into savings' for - we could. And likely will, to some extent. But I am the budget master in this house and I'm already working on how to 'cull out' some money in our monthly budget to put towards the trip so we can dip into savings as little as possible. It's good that we have 14 months to 'save up' for the trip - we do have to make monthly payments starting in July, 2008. And because there are two kids going, those payments are not 'small'. But we'll figure it out.

My mom's day 'gift' was plants from Home Depot. And I did order some cosmetics from Sephora - I am in serious need of 'de-wrinkling' and 'age-defying' makeup so I splurged on some foo-foo stuff. But for the most part, I wanted it to not be about 'stuff'. And it wasn't, which suits me fine. The kids and J. all gave me separate cards - very nice, lovely sentiment cards. And that was plenty.

Still, J. so rarely 'asks' for anything at all. He's the lowest maintenance person I know - and so he will keep the Touch iPod, I hope. I mean, the difference between that and the largest memory 'regular' iPod is only $100. And that's not enough to worry about. There's no issue here. None. We have the $$ for that iPod and anything else he wants. So there's no issue.

I'm just warning him, and reminding him that my birthday is in a few weeks so be ready. My 'frugal' nature make take a back seat to a need for some new clothes. Or my own Touch iPod. Or something else. Who knows?

We have the pool cover on the pool to help it warm up this week. I'm sure we'll be swimming by H's birthday - which as usual, falls on Memorial Day weekend. We have so many other commitments that weekend - we're going to have to negotiate when he'll have the sleepover he has requested. I love how he always gets a 3 day weekend for his birthday - but it just adds a layer of complexity to our holiday weekend that I always wish wasn't a factor. We have a church picnic that Saturday, a double college graduation party that Sunday (his birthday) for two daughters of very, very dear friends (I was blessed to be present in the delivery room when one of these two lovely ladies came into the world and celebrating their graduation from college is an honor I won't miss), and then the Monday 'holiday'. I'm hoping to try to make it a 'long weekend' by taking off that Friday and possibly the Tuesday after as well. I hope to. We'll see.

Well, it's time for the final Survivor vote so I've got to run. Have a terrific week.

J., keep the Touch. I love you, my sweet. Happy Mother's Day to you, too, - you had an integral part in me becoming a mom. Yes, I remember it well. ('nuf said).

Mom's Day

Tomorrow is my day. And many other wonderful ladies' day. It's the celebration of giving birth. Of agreeing, even though you don't realize it at the time, to being counselor, banker, accountant, cook, organizer, sympathetic listener, nagger, worrier, referee, tidier, (sometimes) yeller, (sometimes) best friend, (sometimes) mortal enemy. Mom. A three letter word for a whole lot of stuff.

My gift was a trip to Home Depot where we purchased a new bougainvillea plant to replace the boug we had that died a couple winters ago. It's been cut back regularly as we worked on taking it out - they are not easy to work with (as you know) because they have huge thorns. But my knight in shining armor hubby managed to get the dead plant finally out of the ground and the old, falling down trellis it was entwined with also down and tossed away. The new boug will hopefully go in tomorrow. We had to drag H. along with us to HD because it occurred to me that we had a lot of cash loaded on his Visa Buxx card still from Hawaii - and that isn't HIS money. It's our money we've loaded on his card to allow some Independence in terms of his vacation shopping. So we took him with us and used some of that already paid for $$ to pay for my 'gifts'. Two big bags of potting soil, 3 six packs of pansies and 3 other pansy-like spreading potted plants and we were home. After a Starbucks drive through stop. So good. I miss my iced teas.

The replacement of the boug on Mother's Day seems fitting since we planted the original plant in honor of my mom - bougs were one of her favorites. Our pool was designed around this particular plant - it was the only plant in the yard we told the pool designer we absolutely didn't want to lose. And it was a full, lush beautiful plant that bloomed year round - until a harsh winter did it in. We will cover this one. It is a beautiful pink and should (hopefully) take off and grow like crazy.

Tomorrow, our church is doing a 2nd special collection for a local charity that is finishing a long-term building project and needs funding to cover the last expenses. We are asked to contribute whatever we can - maybe 10% of our 'economic stimulus' payment - which for us would be less than $24 - AND we don't have it yet. So we are making a donation in honor of our mom's that is equal to one dollar for every year they lived - J's mom lived to be 76. Mine lived to be 75. They died within five months of each other - my mom on May 24, 2000, and J's mom on October 26, 2000. So we'll make a donation of $151. An odd amount - but it's OK. A dollar for each year seems a pittance for all they did for us. And for their families. But it'll help a very worthy cause in our town and will help ease the pain we both have on Mother's Day since they died. It's just not the same, no matter how much you think it will be. It's not the amount that matters. It's the reason for the amount. In memory and honor of our mom's. Two amazing ladies.

I gave up my weekly stint at the coffee kart. I just decided that a weekly commitment that takes up 1/2 of my two short days 'off' - many of which are not exactly days off since I'm working frequently on the weekends, either actually going into my office or bringing work home - is not something I want to do. I can do it. I just don't want to. Getting older makes it easier to put 'me' first and to just learn to say 'no'. Or in this case 'I love doing it, but never would have signed up if I'd realized it was an every week think, so thanks for wanting me to work every weekend but no, I won't'. Kind of like that, only nicer. I am on the list of 'backup' when they need help. And I'm fine with that plan. Glad to have more flexibility. J. and B. are playing tomorrow and H. is doing the A/V slides at the 11AM service. And as soon as we're done at church, we're going out for brunch. Probably IHOP 'cuz that's where we usually go for 'breakfast'. We haven't done a breakfast out in a long time. Looking forward to it.

Then running a few errands and coming home to work on the house. And to work on the 'work' stuff I brought home - laptop and two big projects to make progress on were brought home yesterday afternoon.

Work is going OK. Better, in some ways. Same in others. I am trying a 'new' approach and learning to not care so much about things that honestly don't matter. The work matters. The people are just people. I'm good at the job and it's close to home. AND it pays well and has far more potential for future earnings than other possible jobs. Add all those things together, remind myself that I have two sons heading to college and a husband who's less than 8 years away from retirement and you tend to 'get' to the point I'm at - stay. It's a good job doing good work. It's hard, it's stressful, it's exhausting - but I'm good at it. Nothing is forever. But for now, this is where I am.

Time to head upstairs to the nightly 'grooming of the cats'. Sound like a ritual and it's becoming a bit like that. They have been getting 'matted fur' patches so I finally broke down and purchased some 'grooming' tools. They seem to be helping - they get at the 'under fur' - the brush I've been using just gets the 'top fur' and that's not enough. I didn't realize these cats are sort of 'long hair' but they are apparently, and my brushing has been completely inadequate. The new tools get down to the fur under the top coat and pull it out. Tons and tons and TONS of it. And because the tools are metal, the hair doesn't 'stick' to them - it flies everywhere. EVERYWHERE. I keep cat bath towels (like baby wipes) handy and use those to wipe down both cats first (they really like it!) to get their fur a bit damp and then brush - and use the wipes to 'catch' the fur off the tool. It's working. It's very time consuming but they are already looking a lot better and seem 'more comfortable'. Poor babies. Never knew what I was doing wasn't enough.

Happy Mom's Day to all the moms out there. If you're not a mom yet, it's the toughest job you'll ever love.

Filly

Another perspective from J.

It doesn't change my opinion. But it does offer a different view. Maybe they really do love to run. Maybe it's what they live for. I hope this author is right - and Eight Belles died doing what she loved.

But then I think 'but she wasn't doing that. She died after doing that. She died scared out of her mind, in massive, mind numbing pain, with people crowding all around her convincing her what she already knew - it was bad. It was very bad'. So she didn't die doing what she loved. She died after. And it is THOSE moments that bother me. The moments when the running stops because it has to. It's those moments that really trouble me. Those moments keep happening - and I just keep thinking 'why? Why?'

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/05/08/ED3J10IGD5.DTL

Horses

I did not watch the Kentucky Derby this year. I have no intention of ever watching horse racing again. Barbaro broke my heart and I'm never going to be the same.

And again, yesterday, a horse lost it's life because the owner had to win. I just can't handle this sport anymore. They are not born to be ridden that hard and/or to go that fast. Isn't that painfully obvious every time one breaks down? How many times does a beautiful animal have to lose it's life before someone wakes up and says 'hey, maybe we shouldn't really race them like this - it's too risky - they're legs aren't built for that kind of stress'. How long?

It upsets me every time I think about it. Yesterday, the horse broke both ankles - BOTH. And was euthanized where she fell. God bless her.

I just won't watch anymore. It's becoming 'normal' to lose horses during (or now, after) the races and it's NOT normal. It's just not.

Rest in Peace, Eight Belles.

Hotels

Why do hotels use flat sheets instead of fitted for the bottom sheet? I can never figure that out. The MINUTE you pull back the top sheet and light blanket to actually get into bed, the entire bottom sheet on the side you just turned down is now un-tucked and needs re-fixing.

Why are hotel rooms always too warm or too cool? And if it's too cool, why is your only option to pull up the heavy 'decorator' bedspread which will immediately make you too hot? Why are there no extra blankets in the dresser drawer or closet? I know the answer - 'cuz people will take them. But comfort is important. You can always 'charge' people for the blankets that go missing.

Why do hotels put desks where there's no electrical outlet? I had to use my laptop on the 'dresser' since that was the only place there was an easily accessible plug. That involved pulling over a big chair and leaning forward and down every time I used my laptop.

Why do trains look like they're moving even when they're not? At least from a far? Today, there was a massively long freight train - 5 engines - creeping along the tracks on steep mountains - right on the edge of disaster. This one WAS moving, incredibly slowly and carefully. I wished I could pull over and watch. But on the way there, many trains were seen that weren't moving, but it looked like they were. Mind tricks, I guess. I was moving - so they appeared to be moving.

These are just some of the things I wondered about as I headed back home this morning.

The dinner and award ceremony was great - good food, good friends - two of our own district being honored in the same year is really something special - good band, and slots nearby. AND The Nugget has a REAL Starbucks in the lobby - perfection in a casino, in my opinion. Plenty of penny and nickle slots to play on when you start to worry that you're losing too much (which I didn't). It was a great time - but it's always good to be home. J. did pretty much all of the 'honey, please do' list I left, which is FANTASTIC. He's the best!

Tomorrow is church and then errands, followed by working on some work projects I have to get done.

The weekend is already 1/2 over and for me, it feels like it just started. I'm exhausted. Need a weekend to recoup from my weekend. Typical.

Await

I am typing this post with hot rollers in my hair, in a hotel room in Sparks, NV. Awaiting the delivery of an iron and ironing board to my room. No, there is not one in my closet. I was asked twice - and I'd already checked since that IS the logical place you look for an iron. So I should be showering but since I'm waiting (going on 35 minutes now) I will have to freshen up ala washcloth and soap. The outfit I'm wearing will be 'ok' without a touch up - but it is a bit wrinkled 'cuz I never imagined I wouldn't have an iron. So we'll see.

The drive up was pretty -still snow on the ground. I drove J's car to save gas - and enjoyed my iPod until it died. Will charge it tonight for the drive home tomorrow. I will head home early in the morning 'cuz I need some 'home time' this weekend. And because I have a gazillion things to do that are work related and I'd rather work at home.

Had a long, great conversation with Bug yesterday and we were able to clarify a lot of things. She always helps me think things through but she was exceptionally helpful yesterday and I owe her for her ability to bring clarity to my muddled mind. It's youth, I think. That, and she's just genuinely sweet and open and honest and really, truly cares about me as a friend - as I do about her. It was a much needed 'clearing of the air' and I feel 1000 times 'better' than I have for the past few weeks.

Tonight we are celebrating an award given to my boss and another award given to a co-worker. It's a nice way to show our support and will hopefully be fun. I haven't been to Reno in a really long time - the last time J. and I were here, we conceived H. And I think I came up alone for a weekend for a Beanie Baby event when the kids were little. But haven't been up here in a very long time. The drive was longer than I remember. And I'm more 'nervous' than I was then - the steep downgrades unnerve me - or maybe it's the other driver's not slowing down, not backing off, etc. It was a bit stressful and I'm not looking forward to heading down the hill tomorrow.

I always think of things to write and now can't remember a bloomin' thing. So I'll post again later when I recall all the things I was thinking about on the way here.

Bye for now. I brought my travel curlers with me which means I have to curl 1/2 my head, then let them heat up again and curl the other half. Good times.